


Stranger Things Headcanons

by brokenpromisesandhope



Category: Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Genre: Domestic Fluff, F/F, F/M, Fluff, Headcanon, M/M, Makeup, Multi, Smut, Swearing, Swimming, happiness, summertime
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-15
Updated: 2018-12-13
Packaged: 2019-03-31 20:31:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 40
Words: 28,040
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13982799
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brokenpromisesandhope/pseuds/brokenpromisesandhope
Summary: Here are all my headcanons aka fics I may write one day!





	1. Staloncy: kalancy/stonathan getting ready together

**Author's Note:**

> Y’all know my headcanons are fairly long and I’ll probably write fics one day but until then here we are.   
> Come talk to me about them or your own headcanons on tumblr: Mickey-mousemilkovich  
> Xx  
> T

Based on anons from nancykali from this post:http://mickey-mousemilkovich.tumblr.com/post/171783720495/nancykali-these-two-anons-have-been-in-my

So Nancy and Kali LOVE to get ready together and Nancy typically does her like mascara and clear lipgloss, maybe some blush and a shimmery nude eyeshadow if she’s feeling scandalous. Kali on the other hand will wear purple lipstick to the grocery store. 

So one night they’re getting ready to go out- this of course is after Kali convinced Nancy to chop her hair into a bob and get bangs and go bleach blonde with a purple streak (to match her own) and she’s like “lemme do your makeup” and Nancy knows Kali would never have her look a mess but she never wears makeup and Kali always does hers so good like she’s got a bomb ass wing and bright red lipstick and gold highlighter and she’s like “no boo you can look like this too” 

So this leads to Nancy sitting on the bathroom counter and Kali doing her makeup, teasing her about how pale she is the whole time, and finally she’s done and Nancy’s eyebrows are darker and more defined and she’s wearing gold eyeshadow and thick black liner and false lashes and blush and she’s got on this beautiful champagne highlight and a deep plum lipstick that Kali just wants to kiss off of her, and Nancy’s in awe, like “please teach me how to do that!” 

But Nancy’s better with the hot tools, so she crimps Kali’s hair and curls her own while Kali sits on the counter and stares at her - because of course they’re in their underwear they haven’t even had a chance to think about outfits, and she’s just staring at Nancy’s collarbones and her elbows, and her hip where the four of them have matching half crescent moon tattoos. 

By the time Nancy’s covered them both in hairspray, Steve is banging on the door to let them in so he can do his own hair! 

But then Jonathan and Steve are in their walk in closet and Steve’s trying to find the perfect outfit for Jonathan but Jonathan keeps vetoing everything cause he thinks he’d look like a dick, even though Steve wears everything he’s holding up on a regular basis. So finally Steve throws a tight pair of black jeans at Jonathan and a plain white T-shirt that’s been tugged so much at the collar, it shows off some of his chest hair, and it shows off Steve’s class ring that Jonathan wears on a chain cause we know damn well his fingers are super slim compared to Steve’s! 

And Steve dresses himself and then forces Jonathan to wear his leather jacket, even though Jonathan says “this isn’t grease,” to which Steve replies “If it was, I get to be Rizzo.”

Jonathan just rolls his eyes at his dumb boyfriend, but watches as his thick fingers loop through his belt, and his eyes rest on the stark black in on the tan skin of Steve’s hip. 

Once Steve’s dressed, they go bang on the bathroom door so Steve can do their hair, Jonathan had been nervous they were teasing him at first, but they all constantly push it out of his eyes anyway, and now the girls, especially Kali think it’s funny to try to see who can mess it up most. Her and Nancy always get super into it- because if you mess up Steve’s hair, he sulks all night, especially after a few drinks. 

Anyway after about five minutes of banging on the door and Steve hollering that they better not be making out in there, the door opens and a cloud of perfume and hairspray come wafting out. 

“Holy shit Nancy you look like a doll!” Steve says loudly.

“You’re sparkly,” says Jonathan.

“Bow down bitches,” Kali says, “I have many talents.”

“We know,” Nancy says, linking their arms together! Let’s get dressed.”

Twenty minutes later they’re all in the kitchen to pregame, both Jonathan and Steve’s hair done up with more product than the girls, Jonathan wearing the leather jacket despite his protests, Steve wearing a bit of the same highlighter Nancy is because he wanted to be sparkly and extra too. Nancy wearing a gold glittery v cut dress and Kali wearing the same exact one except in silver because they’re matchy girlfriends, Nancy just slightly higher than Kali on heels, to which Kali just says she could push her over if she keeps teasing her, but they both know she’ll keep her arm around Nancy’s waist all night because the girl can not walk in heels sober let alone shit faced.


	2. Stoncy:Clothes Sharing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jonathan’s mustard sweater in season 2 episode 2 truly blessed me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am in love with this and can be easily convinced to write a whole fic.

Joyce got it from the Goodwill. Jonathan’s never been picky like Will, he doesn’t care his clothes are from Goodwill but he just thinks the sweater is ugly. So he throws it in the back of his closet, whatever. Until one day he hasn’t done laundry so he has nothing to wear and he has to wear it to school. So he throws it on and his coat over it with some dark jeans, but Nancy keeps staring at him.  
She tells him the color looks really good on his skin and brings out his eyes to which he just blushes but she keeps insisting. So maybe the sweater isn’t that bad. Even Steve Harrington keeps sneaking looks at him.  
So he forgets about it until it’s thanksgiving and his mom wants him to wear something nice and she tells him that sweater looks nice on him. So he wears it and Will teases him, but he just curls his fingers in the soft sleeves and decides it’s not so bad after all.  
It’s after the snowball dance when Nancy comes home with him and his mom’s at hopper’s and Will is at Lucas’ and they fuck all night long. Finally Nancy demands that Jonathan makes her something to eat because he wore her out (and she can’t help it that he’s been eating her all night and is satisfied she needs actual food) so he finally goes to make pancakes, they’re quick and easy and he plans on feeding them to her and then licking the taste of syrup out of her mouth, when she comes and wraps her arms around his waist from behind.  
He spins around and she’s got that damn yellow sweater on, it’s so big it’s sliding off her shoulder, revealing her shoulder blade, her curls falling down, smeared red lipstick, and smudged eye makeup. It goes almost completely down to her knobby knees and she’s got the sleeves curled over her fingers. She looks way hotter than she has any fucking right to.  
“Does it look as good on me as it does on you?” She asks, Jonathan’s eyes on the smooth skin of her collarbone that’s revealed.  
He nods and pulls her into his arms, setting her on the counter. They fuck on the counter until the smoke detector goes off because Jonathan burns their pancakes. But he just shuts the burner off and keeps going. Nancy says “if you get cum on this sweater I’m gonna be pissed, it’s my favorite.”  
(He doesn’t.)  
So Nancy’s obsessed with stealing Jonathan’s clothes, but she generally always leaves the sweater over there because she likes to take it when Jonathan’s just gotten done wearing it so she can soak in his cologne and warmth for the rest of the night.  
Imagine her surprise when she goes over to meet him, and sees Steve Harrington on the couch in her sweater!!! It looks good on him, and his shoulders are broader than Jonathan’s so the sweater tugs tightly over his chest, hits a little higher, right above his tight ass jeans.  
“Steve’s been having some trouble lately, he came over to study,” Jonathan says, as if that explains everything.  
But with the upside down and everything, she knows that the three of them are the only ones who understand. So she sighs, she hasn’t intended to actually study, she’d done that before she came over, and grabs her backpack and opens it. Nancy’s laying on her side, head propped up on her hand, Jonathan is sitting cross legged across from her, and Steve is laying on his stomach between them.  
Jonathan keeps staring at Steve, and shit Nancy is too, his ass is looking good, but the way Jonathan does it is so sheepish, she wants to laugh. Finally Steve breaks the silence, pushing a lock of hair back,  
“Alright man, what are you looking at? Do I got something on my face?”  
Jonathan splutters and Nancy laughs,  
“Naw. Jonathan just has a thing for hotties wearing his clothes.”  
“Nancy!” He says.  
“Am I wrong?”  
“Hotties?” Steve asks.  
“Although that’s my favorite sweater, I do have to admit, you do look rather good in it.”  
“What’s going on?” Steve asks.  
“You’re hot Steve. Jonathan and I think you’re hot. Right Jonathan?”  
Jonathan’s face is red, but he nods.  
“All because of this sweater?”  
Nancy rolls her eyes, and slides a hand under the sweater and up Steve’s back, rucking the hem of the shirt up with her,  
“No, not because of the sweater, however, I bet Jonathan would agree that you, like me, probably look better with it off, than on.”  
Steve flips over to stare up at her and she winks, biting her lower lip,  
“Wanna find out Jonathan?”


	3. Stoncy (but everybody): Pool

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve Harrington has a motherfucking pool and there’s a severe lack of pool fics.

\- SO Nancy loves swimming and tanning and strutting around in a bikini and Barb is always making excuses but now that Nancy’s boyfriend has a pool and they’re always over there she goes to the mall and forces Barb to pick something out. Barb ends up with a beautiful lavender floral high waisted bikini though she thinks she looks like a whale and of course no convincing from Nancy will tell her otherwise but she’d forked over the money and was gonna wear it \- Jonathan would never say anything and deep down she knows steve wouldn’t either but sometimes his jokes are not funny SO she plans on texting him to not say anything about Barb period pretty much but forgets and they walk back into the back yard and Steve’s in the water leaning against the edge while Jonathan lounges on the chair and Barb pulls off her cover up and Steve just compliments her for like five minutes like he’ll get distracted but then be like “that color looks so pretty on your skin” “Barb why don’t you have a boyfriend” “Nancy your friend is hot” to which Jonathan replies “is two people seriously not enough for you” 

-Jonathan cannot swim!!! When they’d first started dating Steve had invited him over and ended up throwing him in the pool, to which Jonathan straight freaked. Nancy’d come back from the kitchen with lemonade and dropped Steve’s mom’s expensive glass pitcher because Jonathan was spluttering and flailing in the water to which Steve yelled “Jesus Christ stand up” and Jonathan had been embarrassed and Nancy had driven him home in his wet clothes because he refused to go near Steve and then she let him take a warm shower in her house while she dried his clothes and he tearily told her about Lonnie throwing him off the fishing boat in the middle of the lake to teach him to swim \- needless to say it didn’t work 

\- so with the help of Nancy, Steve sets out to teach Jonathan how to swim. Of course he thinks they’re making fun of him at first, but Nancy lets him rub tanning oil on her or Steve will rub sunscreen on his back if he just deals with it and tries 

-Nancy loves tanning and she’ll sit in the sun for hours in her multi colored bikinis, reading a book or watching the kids, or Steve play in the water. Usually it’s not until someone splashes her that she gets in to cool off 

-speaking of which she always unties the straps of her bathing suit so she doesn’t get tan lines and before they’d started dating, she’d accidentally flashed Jonathan and Steve 

-(accidentally on purpose) 

-WILL LOVES SWIMMING and has never had a birthday party because they’re poor, and it was especially hard in the summer when his birthday was because Joyce had to be more selective about the hours she was working SO Steve, Jonathan and Nancy throw him a huge pool party! Hopper grills and Karen had made a cake, and Nancy and Steve even join in on a game of chicken (and lose to freaking Dustin and Barb, mostly because Nancy’s chicken legs) 

-Steve constantly teases that there’s extra chlorine in the pool for a reason and complains that he’s too cute to have never been skinny dipping. Nancy agrees one night after Jonathan’s swim lesson, and pulls herself up on the side of the pool to undo her top, raising an eyebrow at the boys 

\- Steve has to buy a pack of diving sticks weekly because Eleven constantly looses them 

\- Nancy and Jonathan each having a value sized tub of sunscreen that they have to take the time to apply to each kid for like 10 minutes a Day- daycare style - because they are too impatient to do it themselves (including Steve) 

\- Jonathan loves to fall asleep in the sun and he’s fallen asleep multiple times and gotten sunburnt and Nancy always babies him and his poor pale skin with aloe Vera and ice cubes and gives him soft kisses on his forehead 

-Steve just laughs until Nancy threatens to kick him out of their bed unless he helps. He gets to rubbing them ice cubes on Jonathan’s red skin 

-Jonathan likes to trace Nancy’s tan lines with his tongue

-Steve’s hair gets lighter in the sun 

-Barb used to just float around the pool in a big donut until one day El jumps on her lap and sends them both overboard 

\- Constant competitions for who can hold their breath longest (Max wins, then Mike and Eleven tie) 

-Mike questioning why Lucas needs sunscreen and while Barb tries to explain, Nancy just pushes him in the pool with a roll of her eyes 

-Midnight pool makeouts 

-Steve buys those light up things that go in the pool and change colors and Jonathan takes pics of them in the colored water 

-Then Steve takes his camera and Nancy pulls him in even though he’s fully clothed and forces them to take pics together 

-The sun brings out Nancy’s freckles and Steve just stares at her until she pops open one eye and squints up at him asking what the hell he wants he’s blocking her sun 

-So many popsicles (both in innocent and non innocent ways)


	4. Stoncy: canon

⁃ Jonathan telling Steve he knows he’s a good guy and letting Nancy think Steve asked him to take her home and blushing when Steve gives him a long shoulder pat   
⁃ When Steve holds their hands he traces their scars, Jonathan always shivers no matter how long he’s been doing it   
⁃ Steve styles Jonathan’s hair with hairspray and Nancy laughs so hard she cries because Jonathan looks so shocked and then his face gets all red and he’s embarrassed and goes to brush it out and Nancy shakes her head and says “no baby,” and she’s never called him that before and she holds his jaw firmly until he looks up at her and she traces her fingers over his eyebrows and the corner of his eyes and says, “you look great, I can finally see your eyes” and they force him to wear it on their date   
⁃ Nancy constantly stealing both of the boy’s clothes- Steve’s sweats and Jonathan’s flannels- until Jonathan gets mad that he never gets to snuggle in a warm hoodie with Steve’s number on the back and Steve makes her give Jonathan her favorite one. She pouts for most of the movie until Steve says he’ll bring her another one next time   
⁃ Steve finding out Nancy told Dustin that he’s gonna be a catch in a few years and she’s his favorite and him pouting, and she just rolls her eyes because she gives Steve enough attention honestly, she just gave him attention in the boy’s bathroom but then she finishes washing her hands and says, “you’re an idiot Steve Harrington. And you’re a catch right now, now go bother your other partner” and he blushes as Nancy tells Jonathan what happens at lunch   
⁃ Jonathan has a mix tape for literally every occasion   
⁃ They’d all three first started dating right around the holidays and Jonathan didn’t know what on earth to get Steve so he just made him a mix tape and thought Steve would hate it but he’s listens to it all the time   
⁃ Steve and Nancy arguing about which one of them gets to sit next to Jonathan in the booth- Jonathan beet red up to his ears   
⁃ Drunk Steve talking about how lucky he is and Nancy is so beautiful and Jonathan is so beautiful too and how do you both love me I love you both so much don’t ever leave don’t ever leave- and he lays down in the backseat, head on Jonathan’s lap as Nancy drives home   
⁃ Steve loves scary movies but Nancy and Jonathan don’t like them, when they first started dating Nancy started in the middle, and took the opportunities to hide into each of their chest, but then her hiding turned into kissing Jonathan’s neck to distract him and they end up making out for the rest of the movie, Steve giving up about half way in to join them   
⁃ Jonathan wants to take photos of Nancy and she blurts, “sexy pictures?!” Which hadn’t even crossed his mind but then he can’t stop thinking about them   
⁃ Jonathan taking pictures of the other two passed out in his bed   
⁃ Jonathan and Nancy in the stands at Steve’s game!!!!! Jonathan is taking pictures and Nancy is cheering obnoxiously   
⁃ The three of them attempting to do homework but Steve keeps distracting Jonathan by running a hand through his hair or rubbing at his hip where his shirt road up so Nancy has to implement a no touch rule   
⁃ This of course doesn’t last long and turns into strip studying- for every answer you get wrong- you remove an article of clothing- somehow Nancy looses and her boy’s tease her mercilessly   
⁃ Steve and Nancy cannot cook for shit and they try to surprise Jonathan one time with breakfast but he wakes up to the fire alarm, Nancy’s in one of their shirts, hair streaked with flour, face smudged with cinnamon and Steve is in his boxers, fishing shells out of the hot pan of eggs on the stove, a smudge of flour on his nose, they end up having to go out for breakfast


	5. Stoncy: PTSD, stuffed animals, Will and Nancy bonding

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nancy and Will are both obsessed with stuffed animals.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Started with an ask from crazyfangirlmeep and turned into this wild thing that’s so adorable and pure.

Crazyfangirlmeep: Stoncy: Nancy having PTSD over losing Barb and sleeping with a tiny little stuffed dog. Jonathan and Steve help her because they're actually human but most nights they aren't there. One weekend, the whole party and parents and basically just everyone goes on a vacation to some random coastal city. There they find a street festival and Steve wins Nancy a huge stuffed bear. That night as Nancy sleeps in her hotel room with El and Max, she gets the best sleep she's ever had without her boys.

Me: First of all, BLESS YOUR HEART. Second of all, this is adorable!!!! And like she’s embarrassed about stuffed animals at first because she’s freaking 16 years old but Steve always smiles when he sees it propped on her bed, and el suddenly has like 50 stuffed animals because they’re soft and cuddly and Nancy has them too. Omg I love this

Crazyfangirlmeep: And Will also has stuffed animals he sleeps with for the same reason! Mike walks in one day on Will and Nancy exchanging tips on how to fix holes in the fur and sew eyes back on and just walks right back out because he finds it simultaneously weird, sad, and amazing that his sister and best friend share a bond like this. 

Me: Okay this genuinely is so pure. Like Nancy is in FACS right and she cannot cook to save her life, but the girl can sew. So one time will is complaining to mike about his favorite wolf having a hole in it and how his mom wants him to throw it out cause he has a bajillion more and it looks ratty- especially since Will is more keen to take his places. So Nancy approaches will, just casually mentions it to him and he blushes and says thanks for the offer but never mentions it. Flash forward to all of them at the Byers. Jonathan had driven Nancy and mike home with them so they could hang out- and he goes to make popcorn before the movie starts and Mike’s in the bathroom and they come back to see both of them talking, Nancy explaining she can fix it right up and she’s sure Joyce has a needle somewhere and her fixing his stuffed animals and Jonathan staring in awe and mikes like my sister is pretty cool. ALSO ON HER BIRTHDAY ALL THE KIDS CHIP IN AND GET HER A STUFFED ANIMAL and will throws in an extra needle and thread 

Crazyfangirlmeep: Oh this is getting awesome!! I can totally see Nancy trying to teach Will how to sew and Will failing miserably at it. He really wants to make a little stuffed pillow for Mike’s birthday but can barely thread a needle, let alone do a straight (like that would EVER happen) of stitches. So El decides to help him by using her powers and together they manage to create a pile of fabric and stuffing that vaguely looks like a baboon’s butt very thoughtful present. Nancy spends the whole time watching them and laughing her ass off but eventually contributes by neatly embroidering Eleven + Mike + Will on the pillow for them cause that show is just one giant moshpit of poly ships. Steve and Jonathon are so entranced by watching her sew and embroider that it becomes a regular thing for the two of them to hang out and watch Nancy teach Will how to sew. 

Me: Yes! Nancy’s really good at it, and really patient, but he still can’t quite get it. Steve and Jonathan tease her about it, call her “mrs. Homemaker” and she always just tells them they’re jealous because they don’t have any talents (obviously a clear lie but the flush is high on her cheeks)- Jonathan of course makes dinner to prove just how wrong she is and well Steve is good at things that aren’t appropriate when they’re supposed to be babysitting. So they behave and talk to each other and try not to stare at Nancy with her tongue poking out of the corner of her mouth, thin fingers moving the needle.   
Once Mike’s gift is done and eleven and will present it to him, and they all exchange a hug and are super excited, both of the kids jumping all over telling him that Nancy helped and she’s the best over, Jonathan and Steve are super jealous that she’s never made them anything. So of course she has to make them each pillows that are personally embroidered as well. (Steve’s says -boyfriend number 1- the dumb one- and Jonathan’s says -boyfriend number two- the pretty one-) they switch. By the time Valentine’s Day rolls around they’ve made Nancy one too, they figure if she’s obsessed with stuffed animals, why not this. (It says -girlfriend number 1- the sassy sensitive one-) and they SIT ON THEIR SHARED KING SIZE BED IN THEIR FIRST STUDIO APARTMENT 

Crazyfangirlmeep: Omg and they move to New York so that Jonathan can go to NYU!! And on their first day living there, they sightsee around the city and Nancy holds both of their hands instead of just one at a time! Steve buys them a giant stuffed zebra that is practically life size but Jonathan gets annoyed because, “there is no way we can fit that through the front door!” Nancy watches in amusement as they debate different entrances and is insanely happy that she has such wonderful boyfriends. Of course Mike has that amazing ability to interrupt moments and calls the phone as Jonathan and Steve are pushing the zebra through the window to tell her that Lucas and Max just went on their first date with Dustin


	6. Stoncy Camping

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Prompt from crazyfangirlmeep for stoncy camping and sharing a tent! I’ll probably come back to this one.

⁃ Karen makes up some excuse to stay home with holly because you know damn well she’s too bougie to go camping   
⁃ Nancy wishes she could do this too because she’s so not a camping girl either but if Steve can go- she can go   
⁃ Plus mike and will are so excited so she feels bad   
⁃ They hike to the campsite which is a lot of work with all of the kids and just Mr.Wheeler, Mr.Sinclair had ditched so it was just Ted, the teens and the kids   
⁃ Ted made them set up their own tents after he showed how to set up his own  
⁃ After about the third time Mike snaps at her for doing something wrong, Nancy sits down on the picnic table and picks at her nails  
⁃ About twenty minutes later Steve joins her   
⁃ They admire Jonathan’s lithe arms and his ass in his tight little cargo pants as he sets up his and Will’s tent   
⁃ They’ve talked about Jonathan many times but not seriously- they both think they’re too screwed up for him   
⁃ Finally all the tents are set up, Max and Dustin finished first, then Jonathan and will and finally Mike and Lucas   
⁃ After they set up their tents they head down to the creek before dinner - Ted sends the teens to chaperone and it’s not long before Nancy sheds down to her undergarments and runs into the icy water to dunk mike under   
⁃ Steve and Jonathan watch from the shore a little longer as Nancy wrestles with the boys and tries not to get dunked  
⁃ Finally Steve grabs Jonathan’s hand and they shed their clothes down to their boxers and head into the water to help Nancy out   
⁃ They leave water logged and collapse onto the beach, drying before they put their clothes on and head up to dinner   
⁃ They eat hot dogs and s’mores - Nancy roasts the perfect marshmallows- Steve is too impatient- so she ends up roasting them for Steve and then Jonathan sheepishly asks if she’ll roast one for him and she makes sure it’s extra perfect   
⁃ Dustin and Lucas have a s’mores eating contest which ends in both of them getting sick   
⁃ Mike convinced will to try a s’more and they nibble on it together holding hands   
⁃ El eats 6 s’mores and doesn’t get sick, they finally cut her off   
⁃ When it’s time for bed or at least time to head into the tents, Ted decides he’s had enough and has a migraine and needs a tent to himself   
⁃ Mike refuses to share with his sister, he already wanted to share with will and el so the kids end up getting shoved into one tent and somehow Nancy Steve and Jonathan are in the other   
⁃ Steve and Nancy keep sharing looks because Jonathan looks so uncomfortable as they try to get comfortable on the hard ground  
⁃ The blankets are scare and the temps have dropped considerably and Nancy’s hair is still damp from swimming   
⁃ She volunteers to go in the middle, her back to Steve’s chest, staring at Jonathan who’s blushing   
⁃ They end up talking all night- in between hollering to the kids that they need to shut the hell up   
⁃ They stay cuddled together until the early morning when they finally follow Steve, who’s been sleeping on Nancy’s chest, into sleep, Nancy resting her head on Jonathan’s chest.   
⁃ They get woken up the next morning by will who has a huge smile on their face and announces its oatmeal for breakfast to which all three of them wrinkle their nose   
⁃ As they sit and drink black coffee around the fire and push the watery oatmeal around their bowls, Steve asks if he can treat them to a real breakfast once they get back home and Nancy squeals, kissing Steve and then Jonathan quickly when he agrees


	7. Will headcanon

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Headcanon game for Will Byers.

Headcanon A: from a young age he never really understood he was poor so his birthday is his favorite holiday and he gets so excited when his mom bakes him his favorite double chocolate cake and Jonathan makes his favorite meal which is meatloaf and mashed potatoes. 

Headcanon B: Will has eight stuffed animals that are in his bed at all times! He refuses to put them on the floor so when his friends come over they each have their own designated stuffed animal to snuggle with- and will typically lets them sleep with them for sleepovers too, except not his stuffed otter Olly, that one is his only. 

Headcanon C: will is gay but terrified of what anyone will think, especially with the hate his brother gets for being weird and he thinks he’s so cool so he doesn’t know what the world will say about him and he just really wants to paint his nails like El because it’s so fun and pretty but he just longingly draws doodles on his hands instead, and he’s really good at drawing flowers. 

Headcanon D: Will never shuts up, he knows all of these random facts like about space and people and the world and astrology and he just tells everyone any chance he gets. He’s the most talkative of the group and constantly his mom and Jonathan are like, enough! He talks to his mom when she’s in the shower, he talks the entire way to pick up Nancy and then talks both of their ears off on the way to school to the point where Nancy insists on bringing mike so they can have some semblance of their own conversation. Our boy just loves to talk and give random facts.


	8. Modern Eleven

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Modern Eleven headcanons

⁃ she loves stuffed animals and everyone has bought her a ton, in fact Hopper buys her one every time he goes to the store   
⁃ Hopper buys her a cell phone so they can keep in touch but all she does is want to FaceTime him about 6 times a day and she gets really sad if he doesn’t answer. Finally he knocks it down to twice a day while he’s at work   
⁃ El watches Nancy get ready for a date with Jonathan when the gang is supposed to be hanging out and she asks Nancy to help her do her hair and makeup   
⁃ She embraces her natural curls and hopper spends an arm and a leg on products for her hair   
⁃ Nancy takes her to Ulta and she wears silver glitter eyeshadow and pink lipstick for a month until she’s finally convinced to do something more natural   
⁃ Her favorite show is Girl Meets World and Elena of Alvador because she never got to watch kid shows  
⁃ However the Wheelers always watch The Voice and Mike and Nancy watch Riverdale up in her room because their parents don’t approve and she likes that too   
⁃ She loves making bracelets and beading and so everyone in her life has a wrist full of bracelets   
⁃ Max teaches her how to skateboard and hopper buys her one for her birthday so they skateboard to school everyday when Jonathan doesn’t drive them   
⁃ El feels extremely protective over Will, especially when Joyce and Hopper start dating   
⁃ He has bad days a lot and she always offers cuddles with a stuffed animal or some extra eggos   
⁃ While Joyce could never replace mama, El really likes her, especially when she rolls down the windows and turns up the radio really loud and they scream along or when she takes her to get a pedicure   
⁃ El is super bold and loud and always forces her friends to do what she wants, this mostly means she gets to pick the movies for movie night   
⁃ Also she loves going to the movies like something about the movies is her favorite so she goes about once a week   
⁃ Her favorite restaurant is Chick Fil A and when Hopper and her buttheads he always brings her a cookies and cream shake and some waffle fries


	9. Kalancy cornrowing

Ok so I’ve been thinking about this for awhile and I know Kali isn’t black but she is a poc and since I’m black I’ll allow this for her and Nance. 

SO Kali has always wanted to shave the side of her head, she thinks it looks so bad ass and so punk rock and she’s gotta look super punk rock if she’s gonna be one of the only poc at a Fall Out Boy concert okay?! But her mom refuses to let her shave it off (she first asks at like 15) and her mom is just like naw you can’t, absolutely not. SO Kali starts cornrowing one side of her hair back, in like 5 or 6 tiny braids. She gets super good at it and it has mostly the same effect. She does this for years, until she’s like 17.

She meets Nancy when she transfers to Hawkins High School and Nancy is assigned to be her escort. They have all the same classes together and Nancy shows her around and Kali had an inkling she was bi, but now she knows it for sure. Nancy is completely her opposite, a thin white girl, attractive in a girl next door way, who wears a tiny ballet slipper necklace every day and pearl earrings and pleated skirts she’s only seen in student/teacher porn, but somehow Nancy pulled it off. And she pulled off Kali’s leather jacket when she’d slid it off her shoulders to keep Nancy warm at a pep rally.

ANYWAY, Kali’s always doing fun stuff with her hair, adding fun colors or piercing herself or giving herself bangs, and she asks Nancy if she can experiment on her, because white hair is easier to work with than her coarse black hair. So Nancy lets her add blonde streaks and then turn those streaks pink and then she lets Kali give her bangs and the streaks turn into bleaching her whole hair to which even her mom admits looks good, when Nancy sheepishly asks if Kali will give her the braids that she wears all the time. 

Kali laughs at Nancy’s wonder and explains that they’re cornrows and braids the side of her head so they’re matching. Nancy is fascinated and Kali laughs at how pale her scalp is, and Nancy wears the braids for a few days, despite her mom turning up her nose. Eventually Nancy asks if Kali will teach her how to do it, and Kali hesitates because it’s really hard, and there’s no other POC in Hawkins really, but it’s totally cultural appropriation. She explains this to Nancy and Nancy understands but Kali teaches her anyway and just says, “but when we get out of this hell hole and move to Cali, we can’t do this anymore, I’m not trying to get both of our asses beat” to which Nancy laughs. 

It takes Nancy forever to do halfway good cornrows, but Kali always sits on a couch patiently which Nancy practices. Eventually she gets it right, Kali lets her continue to do her cornrows until her mom finally lets her shave the side of her head. 

Nancy doesn’t really do the cornrows after that either, more liked it for matching with Kali, however, when Erica asks her to do her hair and imagine Mrs. Sinclair’s surprise to see this little white girl cornrowing her daughters hair 


	10. Kalancy self care

So when Nancy moves out of her parents house, she moves into a tiny ass apartment after a year in the shitty dorms. She lies to her parents the way you do when you don’t want them to worry about you, so you tell them your apartment is super nice and you can totally afford your bills and you’re not starving or anything like that and you don’t regret moving to a big city because you know anyone and realize how alone you are. (Not that she exactly misses them micromanaging her) but she misses having someone. 

So her thing is that after a particularly hard day, she stops by Aldi, it is perfect walking distance from her apartment and she buys her $3 bottle of wine and then she uses a makeup wipe to wipe off her face and stares herself in the mirror and she looks entirely too old for twenty two and slides on a headband to push back her bangs she regrets cutting, and clips up her hair and runs herself a hot ass bath and dumps in some genaric bubbles and sets up her speaker to blast Shania Twain and she sits in her bathtub and she drinks the entire bottle of wine. She stays in until she’s done crying if it’s been that type of day, or until she nearly drops her phone in the water snapping Barb or until the water is ice cold and she’s so fucking drunk she needs help getting out of the tub except there’s no one there, it’s just her. (She’s gotten several bruises that way)

SO Nancy meets Kali in one of her classes and they start dating and a couple months into it Kali just has a shitty ass day and doesn’t know what to do because she just wants to kill someone, so Nancy brings her to aldi and they each pick out what kind of alcohol they want, Nancy sticks to her wine and Kali buys a 6 pack of beer because she’s fucking gross and Nancy runs them a hot bath and uses her expensive body wash her mom had sent her for Christmas and Kali is like yeah right this is gonna work but Nancy’s like, just wait, and she strips down, completely confident in herself in a way she hasn’t been in years and sinks in, hooking up her phone to blast Cardi B.: Kali’s favorite. 

By the time they’ve moved on to 2000s Britney Spears Kali is so drunk she’s slurring and fighting Nancy for the rest of her wine. Finally she makes Nancy sit between her legs and she just buries her face in Nancy’s neck and runs her hand along her thighs, Nancy is so soft and smells good and is so beautiful and funny, especially when she tries to rap which she sure the fuck cannot do, but finally she presses her lips to Nancy’s ear and says, “okay, this did make me feel better.”

To which Nancy replies “of course it did, I’m always right,” 

And Kali pinches her inner thigh sharply and Nancy jumps, splashing water everywhere, too drunk to be worried about the mess.


	11. Staloncy Skincare

I have a headcanon that especially growing up being Karen’s daughter, Nancy has always had access to expensive and nice hair, skin and makeup products. So her morning and evening routine is SO long, but especially evening. She’s got blonde hair so she has to use her special purple shampoo, and she does weekly hair masks and face masks and she has all these serums and scrubs and her skin is fucking flawless and beautiful and glowing ALWAYS.

So anyway. It’s one of their first nights going out as a foursome, and Nancy and Kali had beat their faces for hours, like they’ve got false eyelashes and their highlighter is blinding and the point is they’ve got a shit ton of makeup on and they go out to the club and they party and it’s all fun and games until Nancy gets too drunk. Like Kali has to force her not to strip in the Uber. 

So as soon as they get home, she slips off her dress and her underwear and falls into bed. And Steve and Jonathan and Kali all like sober up immediately and flip out. 

Like wtf are we gonna do like our beautiful girl she’s gonna be so pissed. So Jonathan sits next to her and is gently like “baby girl lets wash your face huh?” And Nancy’s like “actually can you just eat me out?” And Steve busts out laughing and Jonathan tries again to like prop her up and he says, “Nance, come on baby, your face” and she’s like “or like a milkshake. Steve doesn’t a milkshake sound good?” 

And so Jonathan gives up and Kali’s like “no y’all don’t understand it’s gonna like mess her face up, like you have to do this every day all day!!!! Like this is a routine!! We can’t mess up our babies routine” and so she makes Steve prop her up and she delicately plucks off Nancy’s lashes and uses about 6 makeup wipes to try to get the bulk of the makeup off and then Jonathan comes back looking confused and upset because he doesn’t know what the difference between toner and serum is, but Kali says it’s fine so long as they got the makeup off. And the whole time   
Nancy is practically falling asleep and going between enticing Steve to move his arms from around her waist to her breasts, or convince Jonathan to make her food. 

 

Jonathan promises they already ordered pizza with extra cheese how she likes but she’s gotta let them clean her face. Her expensive bottle of toner gets spilled on the sheets because she moves at the last minute and finally Steve says “fuck it” they’ve got the majority of the makeup off. 

Nancy falls asleep before the pizza even comes, naked in Steve’s lap, while the rest of them eat and smoke lazily. 

When Nancy wakes up the next morning, all three of them feel insanely guilty because Nancy’s got a huge red pimple on her cheek. Nancy hasn’t had a pimple since they were in high school. Kali’s never see her with one. She doesn’t say anything, smiles at them and pours herself a cup of coffee. 

I’m so sorry,” Steve blurts 

What?” Nancy asks 

Your face. We didn’t wash your face properly! We tried but you wouldn’t get up and now you have a pimple!” 

And Nancy busts out laughing,   
Bless your heart sweetie it’s ok, it’ll go away. Oh my god is that why y’all are looking like someone kicked your dog?”

The other two nod and she laughs loudly,   
“I mean I know I’m perfect but god, I’m not that anal”

Although she does yell at them for spilling her toner all over.


	12. Stancy Knee Kissing

So I have this obsession with Natalia’s legs, ESPECIALLY HER KNOBBY LITTLE KNEES SO Steve knows it’s weird but he’s obsessed with Nancy’s legs. They’re so thin but muscular and long and he just loves them. So he has this habit of kissing her knees. Like all the time. She asks for a foot massage and he does it, peppering kisses on her knees the whole time. She loves to wear skirts and shorts and tease him because she knows he loves her legs so much so he’s always pulling her legs into his lap to kiss her knees, or spreading them wide and kissing them and then up her thighs to eat her out. Or she drops a dish and ends up with a gash up her leg that he has to clean and he kneels at her feet, kissing her knees as he cleans the wound with wound wash. Basically a lot of knee kissing and rubbing , ALSO he kisses the backs of her knees when he’s like giving her a massage and they’re naked and he swipes his tongue across the back of her knee and she shudders.


	13. Mileven Summer

⁃ First things first is Mike adores swimming and Steve has a pool so every single day that Nancy goes over to Steve’s, Mike is jumping in her car so they can swim. Of course Jonathan also brings Will and El, and Lucas and Dustin and Max bike there.   
⁃ Mike is extremely old and burns very easily, whereas El gets really tan, so Nancy always yells at him to put on sunscreen while El applies tanning oil   
⁃ Mike gets distracted by El in her bikini, its bright pink and she wears her hair in matching little scrunchie space buns and she wears big mirrored sunglasses and sits on a floatie while Mike pushes her around   
⁃ Until he gets bored and tips her over and they start splashing each other and Mike makes El time them as him and Dustin and Lucas race across the pool   
⁃ Every time El tries to get out of the pool to tan or talk to max or get something to drink, or reapply tanning oil, mike follows her like a lost puppy and just lays on his stomach, staring at her. She’s so adorable with her button nose and freckles and curly hair and then she’ll pull up her sunglasses, blushing and ask what he’s staring at, and then he says, “an angel”   
⁃ They ride bikes around town and go get ice cream, it’s their favorite date, El always gets strawberry which is so boring and Mike gets whatever flavor has the most shit in it and she always teases him until he pushes her ice cream cone in her face and she chases after him screaming until the owner comes outside and tells them to leave   
⁃ They always hold hands no matter how sweaty it gets   
⁃ They love Netflix and chilling- literally just chilling and making out and laying in the air conditioning, El in shorts and Mike’s hoodies that she constantly steals   
⁃ El makes the best lemonade - it’s always perfectly sweet and every time she comes over, he begs her to make a pitcher   
⁃ They sneak out to the park at night and sit on the swings talking and holding hands until El dares Mike to jump off and he does but scraps his knee and she kisses it better and she says “I love you”   
⁃ They get caught in a summer rainstorm and they have to hide out in the cabin, mike attempts to light a fire but nearly burns them to a crisp so he has to wear some of hoppers clothes and is super embarrassed   
⁃ Not as embarrassed as when Nancy has to drive them on their dates when they wanna go places at night because Nancy just calls them adorable and asks if she’s sure they don’t wanna double date and it makes mike wanna cringe but el thinks it’s cute   
⁃ They climb up on the roof and watch the stars and El says “I think I’m falling in love with you” and mike says “I’m already there. I’m so in love with you I don’t know what to do”   
⁃ Also Will has a bonfire one night and El makes Mike roast marshmallows for her cause he normally does it perfectly but he keeps screwing up because she’s asked him specifically and finally she just eats a burnt one and gives him marshmallow kisses   
⁃ Also Mike gets red after being outside for like 10 minutes and El always makes fun of him   
⁃ Once he’d tried to be macho and forget sunscreen and he gets a horrible sun burn and won’t let El see him but his mom lets her in and she applies aloe Vera and ice to his back and neck and sings to him to try to make him feel better   
⁃ Also he loves that every time he sees her her nails are painted a different color


	14. Kalancy Driving Headcanons

Nancy Hates driving with a capital H so Kali always drive \- In return Nancy always lets Kali listen to her favorite music first and then Nancy picks out some songs -Nancy is horrible at giving directions \- Kali has horrible road rage and does not stop at yellow lights -Nancy constantly will have the heat on yet have her window cracked \- Nancy always keeps like 8 pairs of sunglasses in the car for them \- music is always constantly blasting, it’s not really a time to talk just be together -Kali drives like a bad ass with one hand and the other hand is constantly holding Nancy& rests or on her thigh \- no matter where they go their first stop is always to get iced coffee -Nancy constantly sings along to the radio and has to beg Kali to \- Kali has a sunroof and Nancy always wants it down even tho it messes up Kalis hair -Kali also had to pick out a car with heated seats because Nancy is a freeze baby


	15. Stoncy headcanons

SFW:   
1: who cooks?  
OK I go back and forth, Jonathan cooks and well like he will make sure they get their veggies and not too many carbs HOWEVER Steve and Nancy attempt to cook but they just make a mess and are not very good chefs but also YOU KNOW DAMN WELL KAREN TAUGHT NANCY TO MAKE A HOTDISH so like maybe it’s just Steve that distracts her in the kitchen plus she’s not gonna be a housewife so yeah Jonathan cooks or they eat lots of take out!! 

8: Who knows how to swim, who doesn’t?  
I HAVE A FIC PLANNED BASED ON THIS. Steve and Nancy know how to swim and Steve plays obnoxious games and dunks you under and highkey does too much and Nancy mostly tans or sits on the edge but she does indulge Steve sometimes. Jonathan can not swim like he’s terrified of the water so he mostly sits with Nancy and burns (until one time steve yanks him in the pool and he almost drowns I’m telling you I have a fic planned) and then they teach him how to swim but yeah baby boy Jonathan cannot swim. 

10: Any pets or plants? Ok no one can garden lmao so no plants. Pets… I can see them with a cat who mostly cuddles with Jonathan and Nancy because they know how to chill the fuck out- it’s name is like… Fitzi aka fitz from scandal they all have a crush on and Steve really needs his own wild cat so they adopt another one that he names zoomie and that cat always chases him around but he adores it. 

NSFW:   
1: how often do they have sex if at all?  
LMAO. They gotta do something sexual each day. Like it may not be full on penetrative sex but there’s some heavy making out and hand jobs and fingering in the kitchen while dinners being made or some overzealous washing in the shower or some bedroom grinding that turns into a weird grinding trio. But yeah all they do is fuck fuck fuck fuck FUCK. I cannot emphasize this enough 


	16. Nancy loves Cardi B

Okay so modern Nancy loves Cardi B. Do not take this away from me! I’ve never been more serious lol. So I Do- is her favorite song. HER FAVORITE SONG BECAUSE OF COURSE IT IS.   
so let’s talk about Nancy with her little curly short hair half up half down, gold hoop earrings that are a bit too big for her mothers liking, lashes dark with mascara, blue eyes wide, champagne highlight on otherwise care skin because her skin is perfect of course, and deep red lipstick, and long marble fake nails, blasting music as she pulls up in her Ford Escape to pick up the kids from school (because why ever the fuck she needs to) 

And Max slides in the front seat because Nancy is her favorite, and the rest of the kids all smush in the back (El on Mikes lap of course), they’re all going to the Byers anyway, Nancy to pick up Jonathan and meet Kali and Steve at his house, and the kids will be at the house chilling or whatever- the point is, Nancy’s radio is up at full volume like it always is, and Mike is fucking scandalized as his sister sings, “Pussy so good I say my own name during sex” ALOUD IN FRONT OF HIS FRIENDS AND SCHOOL AND HE SHOOTS UP TO REACH FOR THE RADIO and Nancy smacks his hand away and Max says,   
“Oh I think I like this,”   
And Nancy says,   
“What Mike, it’s true”   
TO WHICH DUSTIN BUSTS OUT LAUGHING AND MIKE JUST FLUSHES RED THE WHOLE TIME. 

Some of Nancy’s favorite lines:   
“Pussy so good I say my own name during sex” 

“broke hoes do what they can, Good girls do what they told,Bad bitches do what they want” 

“Only real shit comes out my mouth and only real niggas go in it” 

“If they can't make you richer, they can't make you cum” 

Obviously she doesn’t say the N word.. no one does because they’re not black and I ain’t got time 

BUT Max is like damn bitch I’m  
Empowered this is why I love Nancy and Nancy is like low key this makes me wanna break up with the boys, like men are garbage except of course she won’t. 

AND the first time Jonathan hears it he’s like “damn like cardi is a savage, Nancy you’re a savage” and Steve is like “true” to the pussy so good I say my own name during sex thing and Kali says “true” at the same time and they high five and Nancy pops her gum and laughs and Jonathan reaches over and pokes her thigh,   
“I know I can’t make you rich, but I can still make you come right?” 

And Nancy busts out laughing and kisses him at the next red light smearing red lipstick all over his mouth 

Also Nancy drives, Jonathan rides in front and Steve and Kali always sit in back fucking around and doing the most.


	17. Kalancy iced coffee

So Nancy is a coffee snob. Well not really, she makes anything work, Kali has seen her drink hospital coffee with about seven splendas and four cream packets. Or drink it with skim milk and no sugar when she’s at her parents house. It’s just that she likes Starbucks. Every day. And her order correct. Please and thank you.

 So anyway, her newest kick has been iced coffee. She loves it. Even though her new obsession had started in the middle of February like a crazy person. So anyway. It’s July now. And hot as fuck. And Nancy is unfortunately stuck at work. But she’ll be home soon after sitting in traffic with no air conditioning cause the AC in her car went out last week. 

So Kali is going to make her iced coffee. She is. So she does the first thing that she thinks she should do as a fucking... adult.. and googles it. She finds a recipe that seems good for iced coffee, and gets out two cups, Nancy’s favorite with little cherries on it, and two bendy straws that Nancy keeps in their apartment for when Holly visits. 

And she gets out the leftover coffee from this morning, and some creamer and sugar and the blender. She measures out the coffee, creamer and sugar and then adds some ice and starts the blender, fighting the urge to cover her ears. At the same time, Nancy walks in and sets her purse down, then covers her ears and shouts over the blender,  
“What the hell is going on?”

Kali gestures to her phone where the recipe is still sitting up on her phone, and Nancy picks up the phone, looking over it as Kali stops the blender and opens the lid. It’s chunky with cubes of ice and foamy. It looks nothing like the picture. 

“You looked up a recipe for iced coffee?” Nancy asks, blue eyes widening. 

“Well yeah how else do you make it?” Kali asks, a frown on her face. 

“No, no, it’s good,” Nancy smiles and Kali shakes the blender a bit.

“This looks like shit.”

“I’m sure it’ll taste good,” Nancy says encouragingly, adding a couple more ice cubes. 

“This is a disaster,” Kali says, “you don’t have to drink it.”

“Of course I’m gonna drink it baby!” Nancy says, taking the blender from her and pouring them each a glass.

She takes a sip through the straw, it’s not sweet enough for her and a bit warm, but the ice will fix that, she shakes the glass,“It’s good,”

“You’re a fucking liar,” Kali says, taking a drink herself.

She looks so disappointed that Nancy has to kiss her softly,“I like it.” 

“You have to say that if you want your cuddles tonight,” 

Nancy points a finger at her and then rolls her heavily made up eyes, taking another drink of her iced coffee, “I mean that’s not a lie, but still, I’ll drink it. I like it.”

She pecks Kali again who looks like she absolutely does not believe her, 

“I’ll leave it to Starbucks next time.” 

“Whatever babe,” Nancy says, taking another drink, “but you gotta wash the blender, it’s your night for dishes,” she kisses her cheek and laughs, walking through the kitchen to their bedroom. 

Kali flips off her back,   
“See if I ever do anything nice for you again,” she mumbles, taking another drink of the coffee.

Nancy pokes her head around the corner, work shirt half unbuttoned,   
“What did you say?” 

Kali smiles,  
“Nothing boo. Nothing at all.”


	18. Staloncy love languages

Nancy Wheeler: Words of Affirmation

 Nancy needs to be told that she is valued and loved and cherished. She never heard anything from her father especially, hence her major major daddy issues. But from Karen it was a constant stream that Nancy needed to be quieter, prettier, thinner, nicer, better, faster, everything. So Nancy doesn’t believe anyone could truly love her, especially when there was someone smarter, prettier, thinner out there. So Nancy needs reassurance. And they are happy to give it to her. Steve is always telling her what a good cook she is, or how pretty she is, how he loves her hair or her body or how sweet she is. Jonathan says he likes her humor and her sarcasm, her eyes and the way she does her hair, and the way she takes care of all of them. Kali tells her how smart she is, how she could never finish high school let alone college, or deal with her crazy ass family yet Nancy is still so sweet and kind and giving. 

Jonathan Byers: Acts of Service 

Jonathan has always taken care of his mother and brother forever. Joyce is a good mother, she would die for her kids but when you have to work 2-3 jobs at any given time to take care of things, it’s hard to be there for your kids completely. That combined with her abusive relationship she didn’t leave until Jonathan was 10, and then she needed help with the cooking and cleaning and taking care of Will and herself. Jonathan loves when people do things for him. Anything. Like when Nancy buys his favorite soda, or packs his lunch, Steve always makes sure to do his laundry with Steve’s or he’ll just let him borrow his own clothes, or he will suggest Jonathan go naked. Kali is always making him new playlists or burning him new CDs because his car is old. They never make Jonathan do the dishes, or Steve will wash his car for him, Nancy will wash his hair for him or iron his work uniform, and Kali will do the grocery shopping for him.

 Steve Harrington: Physical Touch 

Now Steve was a victim of physical abuse at the hands of his father. It started as spankings that went too far and then beatings for no apparent reason. Hence why Steve turns to sex at a young age and learns that touch can feel good. By the time he starts dating Nancy he’s mostly buried his trauma and continues to be obsessed with touch. He’s constantly touching Nancy’s hair or arms, likes cuddling more than actual sex. (Well ok he loves sex too but needs many cuddles). He’s constantly clinging onto someone. When they’re watching movies, he loves dogpiling with all of them. Or they all cram together in bed, sleeping sweatily together. He always has to sit in the back seat next to someone, always holding someones hand, Kali always dragging a hand through his hair, Nancy always rubbing his stomach, Jonathan always pulling him into his lap. He wraps his hand around Nancy while she’s cooking or plays with Kali’s hair while she does her makeup in the morning. 

Kali Prasad: Receiving Gifts 

Kali remembers nothing from her childhood. She didn’t think she had a personality until she got away from the lab and developed one. So whenever someone thinks of something that reminds them of her, she’s in shock. She feels like she barely knows who she is, but apparently she has enough of a personality that her boyfriends and girlfriends can bring her something. A necklace, a book they think she’d like, a tshirt they found at the thrift store, a movie they want her to see. She loves that she has 3 amazing people to care about her and think about her, even when they’re away from her for just a few hours.  


	19. Matchmaker Stoncy

BUT MATCHMAKER STONCY MATCHMAKER STONCY MATCHMAKER STONCY 

so first let’s do... meddeling Dustin. He just casually mentions that Nancy and Jonathan keep asking about him and how he’s doing and Steve’s like wtf why would they do that? And he still likes Nancy of course, shit he loves Nancy, he misses her, but he’s not.. resentful towards Byers anymore. 

In fact he finds himself staring at him, his intense eyes, thin lips, wiry arms to see what Nancy sees in him.. and he sees it. He.. he likes them. Both. 

So Dustin keeps asking him about them and finally they all meet at the wheelers and first it’s awkward, Nancy and Jonathan on the loveseat and Steve in the arm chair awkwardly chatting when the kids barrel in after chess club and Dustin purrs at Steve, Steve flips him off and Dustin laughs. Mike shoos them downstairs and gets everyone snacks. 

Ok fast forward stoncy happens, they hang out in the living room or in Nancy’s room, depending how long they have before their parents get home and how short Nancy’s skirt is or how many buttons Steve’s worn his shirt unbuttoned all day or how tight Jonathan’s skinny jeans are so anyway, they’ve got the music on and they’re fucking around when Steve goes to get a condom from his car cause they’re out and he had the most clothes on surprisingly and so he walks pst the kitchen and what does he see.. MIKE KISSING EL right there against the counter, two liter of pop in his hand. 

Steve tries to hold in his gasp and sneak back up the stairs but stubs his toe and lets out a grunt and then mike drops the soda all over and curses. 

(Nancy asks why the floor is sticky later and smacks Steve cause he forgot the condom). 

NEXT TIME Steve is going to find some food, he’s fucking starving and there’s mike.. in the kitchen KISSING WILL.

He’s not prepared again and bangs himself on the wall, swears extremely loud and books it up the stairs. Nancy kisses his elbow that’s literally bleeding and asks what happens and Steve pants it out and of course Nancy gets this little grin on her face and they devise a plan to get the three of them together.

Insert line: “I always knew mike was greedy for love and attention like me, he’s gonna LOVE having two partners.” 

“That’s why you’re with us? You need the love of more than one person?” Steve asks.

“Fuck yeah. You two are barely enough to handle all this,” she says trailing a hand down her body. 

“We’ll see about that.” Says Jonathan


	20. Staloncy Winter

The love of my life asked for staloncy headcanons so I had to comply of course: 

⁃ Nancy is a huge freeze baby but continues to walk around in cardigans, bralets, the boys sweatpants and slippers   
⁃ She always presses her cold toes on you while you’re sleeping   
⁃ Kali is obsessed with baileys and hot chocolate so they pretty much drink spiked drinks every night   
⁃ Jonathan has the best chili recipe in the entire world and so they smell it cooking all day and all gather on the couch to watch Greys anatomy and eat dinner   
⁃ However Nancy has her grandmothers Christmas cookie recipe and they’re so good that Kali literally gains 5 lbs from eating them and the homemade fudge and caramel corn   
⁃ They can barely afford the heat in the apartment so they sit in front of the fire place most of the time, sharing body heat and a shit ton of blankets   
⁃ They’ve all been pretty isolated from their families except Jonathan but they can’t afford to all go home and they try to force him to go but they’re his family so he doesn’t want to leave them so they get drunk and high and fuck and are all pretty much resigned to a boring Christmas, another day of them just being a couple and doing what they usually do. Maybe stuffing their faces with frozen pizza and cookies if they feel fancy BUT Steve and Jonathan actually bought them all presents and decorate things and fill stockings like Santa came while the girls sleep  
⁃ When Kali wakes up she’s nearly in tears and they’ve got her. A bunch of shit that she never asked for but is so thoughtful she just wants to die and she just sits in Steve’s lap and tries not to cry into his neck but it doesn’t really help cause he just keeps encouraging her to keep opening present and each one is more personalized than the other   
⁃ Nancy does cry, especially at the necklace with each of her partners birthstones in it and her hands shake as she tries to put it on so Jonathan has to do it   
⁃ Jonathan forces them all to go sledding and Nancy would rather die, her nose is red the second they step out the door but they have a blast and it’s Jonathan ushering them in the house in case they really do freeze to death   
⁃ Steve likes to stand outside and catch snowflakes on his tongue and then kiss whoever he’s closest to with his cold ass mouth   
⁃ They share bubble baths because it’s so cold in their apartment   
⁃ Kali makes Steve give her piggy back rides because it’s so cold on their wood floor  
⁃ They have to do laundry like three times a week cause the girls are always stealing their warm clothes  
⁃ Their house constantly smells of weed and cigarettes cause it’s too cold to go outside or even open the patio door to air it out   
⁃ Once when they’re waiting for the bus Kali starts a snowball fight but never again because Jonathan shoves a handful of snow down her shirt and she doesn’t talk to him the rest of the day   
⁃ Jonathan is the best boyfriend because neither of the other three will get in the car unless it’s preheated   
⁃ Jonathan gets up every day and the first thing he does is cleans everyone car off   
⁃ He gets rewarded with blowjobs and fat blunts   
⁃


	21. Staloncy sleeping arrangements

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A lovely tumblr ask about my headcanons about them sleeping.

Staloncy.. oh hell YEAH.

So they have a big ass king bed that comfortably fits four, but they are right on top of each other all the time. It usually ends up being Jonathan, Nancy, Kali, then Steve, Kali and Steve always doing the most and teasing each other, Kali giving him hickies as he’s trying to go the hell to sleep. Jonathan always resigned to his nightmares but Nancy usually helps and sings lullabies in his ear, and of course, Nancy keeps her legs tangled with Kali, hands wrapped around Kali’s waist. 

But sometimes it’s Jonathan spooning Steve, running his long fingers over his hips and back, massaging Steve’s scalp, and Nancy in front of Steve, maybe massaging his back when he turns around to kiss Jonathan’s cheekbones and Kali spooning Nancy, hands wrapped around Nancy’s waist, face in her neck, hands on her stomach, fingers linked with Jonathan’s as they hold hands over all of the bodies. 

Nancy has insomnia, but so does jonathan. Jonathan also gets nightmares really bad. Sometimes, if Nancy can’t calm him down, they’ll switch so Kali can card a hand through his hair and send him positive thoughts and dreams. None of them know she can do this of course, but she always makes sure she can touch Jonathan cause he wakes up screaming more nights than not. She can sense it before these attacks come on most times, and tries to make it work and catch it before he wakes himself, and the others up. 

Nancy has a hard time sleeping too and Steve always suggests wearing her out in a sexual way, but most times she just needs to go read, or take sleeping pills.

Steve will fall asleep ANYWHERE AT ANY TIME. So he really really is the first one to fall asleep, almost all the time. He’s always so tired and so worn out, that as soon as his head hits the pillow, and he’s got his arms wrapped around someone, he’s out. 

STEVE STEALS ALL THE BLANKETS. 

Kali is always running hotter than anyone else so they pretty much have to sleep naked, especially if you’re cuddling with her. 

Nancy is the one who always wakes up the earliest and Steve and Kali are the ones who sleep the latest. 

Jonathan wakes up soon after Nancy and they usually quietly mill along and dress in just enough clothes to get to the kitchen. Jonathan starts the coffee and they brush their teeth together and Nancy sits on the counter and whisks the omelet ingredients while Jonathan heats the skillet and does the toast. 

Kali likes sleeping with music on in the background. Or Nancy will sing to her and play with her hair, tracing patterns on her back. 

They generally go to sleep around eleven, but it’s always like an hour of talking and giggling so they’re perpetually tired. 

Nancy is a pillow hoarder. 

Jonathan kicks in his sleep. 

Sometimes Steve drools. 

Kali has ice cold feet. 

Nancy sleeps with socks on a lot, even if she’s naked. 

Nancy needs it to be fully dark in their room. 

They shower at night so they all smell like their body wash and everyone’s skin is soft and smooth from lotion, and they have very nice sheets that slide against their skin. 

I feel like I have more but like.. I’m so shook right now and excited. 


	22. Kalancy Ask meme

who hogs the duvet - **Kali, though she claims she doesn’t. However Nancy usually hides her own blanket in the crack between the bed and wall.  
**  


who texts/rings to check how their day is going - **Nancy mostly texts often and makes Kali call her as she walks to her car after work because she works later and Nancy is always concerned.**

**  
**who’s the most creative when it comes to gifts- **Kali, she pays attention to every small thing Nancy says so she ends up getting many random gifts that she never thought she’d needs but loves because she’d randomly mentioned something once.**  
  


who gets up first in the morning- **Kali, Nancy never used to be able to sleep in so the girl will stay all day. Kali usually wakes her up around ten in the morning, with kisses and coffee.**

  
who suggests new things in bed - **Nancy is one kinky motherfucker so she’s always suggesting something new, mostly because she’s been exploring her body since she got her own place and she mostly knows what she wants. Plus she just wants to do anything with Kali like anything she’s given a second thought to - like public sex or handcuffs.**  
  


who cries at movies - **Nancy. Kali is a big bad girl who never cries ever ever. (Jk but yeah, Nancy cries at anything.)**  
  


who gives unprompted massages - **Kali, she loves to have her hands on Nancy in any way possible and at any time. She’s very touchy feely and feels the need to be touching Nancy almost all the time. (I do like your headcanon where she can send visions by touch) but Nancy finds comfort in touch as well so she always starts massaging Nancy.**  
  


who fusses over the other when they’re sick - **Nancy is used to taking care of Mike and Holly’s illnesses when they were sick. Giving them everything her mother never gave them, cuddles and cold baths and wash cloths on their foreheads, and homemade soup, and fresh clothes and blankets heated in the dryer for exactly 12 minutes. Aka she does the same for Kali.**  
  


who gets jealous easiest **\- Kali, only because she has a super hot amazing wonderful girlfriend and she’s scared someone is gonna take her. (Little does she know that Nancy worries about the same thing.)**  
  


who has the most embarrassing taste in music - **Nancy. You may here one direction, big time rush and Camp Rock right after you hear Drake and Shania Twain.**  
  


who collects something unusual - **Kali. Idk what she collects, but whatever it is she has a ton.**  
  


who takes the longest to get ready - **NANCY is so high maintenance that it truthfully is embarrassing. She has so many makeup and hair products that it’s borderline a problem and she usually has to roll out of bed a good forty five minutes before Kali to stand naked at the vanity getting ready, and then eventually Kali rolls out of bed to get ready and still finishes before Nancy. Every single time.**  
  


who is the most tidy and organised- **Nancy - Karen all but beat it into her, how to keep everything clean and organized, but Kali has never really had a lot of stuff that she had to keep clean anyway, so she’s a bit messy and unorganized.**

  
who gets most excited about the holidays - **Nancy, only because Kali has never had any holidays, so Nancy shows her all of her traditions and they make their own, like driving around listening to Christmas carols and looking at lights, while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies they’d spent all day making. Or watching Hocus Pocus the best movie ever. Nancy throws Kali a surprise party like three days in a row until she’s finally like that’s enough. Nancy is so excited to show Kali things that she treats her like a child, and Kali just grins and goes along with it because Nancy is so damn adorable in a Santa hat that she can’t let it go, even though if she has to eat one more chocolate Santa she’s gonna puke.**  
  


who is the big spoon/little spoon - **Kali is the big spoon, even though she’s only two inches taller than Nancy, Nancy likes to feel tiny tiny.**  
  


who gets most competitive when playing games and/or sports- **KALI. Oh god she does not understand things like - let kids win- so Holly cries when Kali whoops her ASS at Trouble and Nancy is like dear god I’m dating a monster. Or when she straight up tackles Mike during flag football and nearly dislocates his shoulder.**  
  


who starts the most arguments - **Nancy- she can be the biggest bitch ever and knows just how to press Kali’s buttons and push her away. It’s been drilled into her mind from a young age that she is unlovable and she tells Kali all the time, which pisses her off more and more. Their arguments mostly stem from Nancy’s insecurities and internalized homophobia and she calls Kali on her shit, but in such a rude way that it ends with them screaming at each other until their both in tears.**  
  


who suggests that they buy a pet - **Kali and by suggest I mean beg. So Nancy takes her around to different shelters until she finds a perfect black cat with big green eyes. And Kali lets Nancy name her.**  
  


what couple traditions they have- **Saturday mornings are for sleeping in, coffee with too much creamer, bubble baths and naked cuddling and slow fucking until they have to get out of bed so they can at least grab the take out menus and pick out some food. The usually wrap themselves in blankets and argue over who has to get the door and they sit in bed naked and watch movies or netflix or whatever new shows they are on. And they eat and then they usually paint nails or braid each others hair and then eventually fall back asleep again. (This usually happens every saturday) OR when they’re running errands together, Nancy is always the driver and Kali controls the music and they buy iced coffees and drive around with the windows down and have too many pairs of sunglasses.**  
  


what tv shows they watch together - **Oh lord. So many. Nancy is a huge reality TV fan so all of the real housewives shows, Criminal Minds, Bates Motel, also any of those like Real ID shows that go into like the human psyche because Kali really likes that stuff. Or anything with women supporting women like - big little lies.**  
  


what other couple they hang out with- **Steve and JONATHAN. Joyce and Hopper.**  
  


how they spend time together as a couple- **Doing anything. Kali loves to read and Nancy chills beside her and watches her or is on her phone. They love to cook or do their hair and makeup or watch movies and shows or cuddle or fuck or go on long car rides.**  
  


who made the first move- **KALI. who knows if Nancy ever would have but Kali knows what she wants and goes after it and from the moment she saw her she knew she wanted Nancy Wheeler.  
**  


who brings flowers home- **Kali. Big huge bouquets that make Nancy wanna cry they’re so pretty and then she tucks them into Nancys hair and Nancy dries them and places them into journals.**  
  


who is the best cook- **Nancy. because again, Karen Wheeler. This girl will kill you with a hotdish or a pasta salad or a jello salad or a DESSERT. Like damn a bitch can cook. Also Kali forgot how to cook and will live off of takeout (and not gain a pound) which also makes Nancy wanna choke, as she was living off lowfat everything until she got her own house.**


	23. Jancy ask meme

So I got two anon requests for this- so here’s to both of you. Cheers. xxx 

  


who hogs the duvet- **Jonathan cause he’s always cold and so small. And Nancy likes when he sleeps with no shirt on!**  
  


who texts/rings to check how their day is going- **Nancy constantly messages Jonathan a billion messages about her day, with 800 emojis and constantly asks how he is.**  
  


who’s the most creative when it comes to gifts- **Jonathan. Being poor will do that to you, you can turn anything into a gift. And Nancy always gets so excited about everything that Jonathan loves doing it.**  
  


who gets up first in the morning- **Nancy. Only because Jonathan is always taking forever taking forever to fall asleep because he’s scared of his nightmares, so when he doesn’t have a nightmare, then Nancy lets him sleep until he wants to get up.**  
  


who suggests new things in bed- **Nancy. She’s into everything and pretty confident in her body, she started masturbating at a young age. Jonathan struggles to ask for what he wants, so Nancy is always suggesting something new and Jonathan loves it, much like he loves when she takes control and shows him what she wants. He’s so in awe of her he doesn’t know how to handle it.**

  
who cries at movies- **Nancy. Only because Jonathan doesn’t cry, he’s been through too much in his life to cry over someone else.**  
  


who gives unprompted massages- **Jonathan. He just wants to take care of her all the time. And he’s good at it, one of the few things he thinks he’s good at.**  
  


who fusses over the other when they’re sick- **OK I STRUGGLED. But let’s do Jonathan, just because Joyce was always working and Will was a very sick child, he was always getting the flu, or colds, or pink eye or ear infections, and he would spend the night crying, no matter what Jonathan did. He’d tried soup and crackers, and peanut butter toast and home remedies and everything, but it didn’t work out. Nancy is obviously much better than a child, wrapping herself in all the blankets, shivering even though she has a high fever. She eats the soup he heats up for her and mostly just wants to sleep and cuddles, though she doesn’t want him to get sick, but he usually ends up getting it anyway, so he breaks off some layers of the blankets and lays with her, pushing her sweaty hair out of her face as she dozes.**  
  


who gets jealous easiest- **NANCY. Because everyone flirts with Jonathan, and why wouldn’t they - He’s tall with lithe muscles and bright eyes and a soft smirk and high cheekbones and he wears shirts that are too big for him and show off his biteable collarbones BUT JONATHAN NEVER NOTICES. So they’ll be sitting in line at the grocery store, Jonathan going to pay and the cashier flirting and teasing him, finding any excuse to touch him- just collect the coupons bitch like there’s no reason to touch him!!! And what is she, chopped liver?! Like she is a very cute and beautiful girl and they look nothing alike so Nancy is just pissed and she SLAMS the bread on the conveyor belt and storms up to Jonathan whos just letting this bitch STROKE his arm, and she slides a hand into his back pocket and squeezes, “Babe, hurry up, we’ve gotta get home,” she says stretching up to kiss his cheek. And he just turns like a dork and is like “Why do we have to get home?”  The girls face turns red as Nancy turns Jonathan’s face towards hers and kisses him deeply, purposefully smearing her bright red lipstick across his mouth, “That’s why,” she says with a smirk and he blushes and the girl slams the register drawer closed a little too hard and Nancy glares, daring her to say something, and they pack the groceries and when they get in the car, Nancy smacks Jonathan’s thigh, “What the hell!” but again Jonathan had no clue she was even flirting and he just stares at her eyes wide as she goes on about what is she chopped liver, with his wide eyes and red mouth and he swears he never even looks at anyone but her - and there’s red lipstick on his canine which makes Nancy laugh and she says, “ok ok I believe you”**

who has the most embarrassing taste in music- **Nancy, only because Jonathan is lowkey pretentious when it comes to music.**  
  


who collects something unusual- **Jonathan, but again idk what he would collect.  
**  


who takes the longest to get ready - **Nancy. She is Karen Wheeler’s daughter of course and she always wants to look nice because Jonathan is always complimenting her lashes and kissing her lipstick off and Will is always asking how she looks so sparkly (highlight) and Joyce taught her how to do perfect winged eyeliner.. I’m crying in the club.**  
  


who is the most tidy and organised- **Jonathan. Nancy has no concept of being organized, and always messes up Jonathan’s CDs because she promises she remembers which one it is that had her favorite songs but she never does and she doesn’t understand why he needs them in alphabetical order anyway.**  
  


who gets most excited about the holidays- **Jonathan, they never had much money and his mom did have to work most holidays, at least part of the day, but she always cooked amazing homemade meals and made sure Will was taken care of and there was always so much love and happiness and Nancy has never really had that with her family, so he’s excited and cant even be embarrassed that they’re eating TV dinners on the living room floor watching home alone and Will has already eaten nine christmas cookies. Nancy laughs and places her bet on Will eating more cookies than Jonathan to which Jonathan just says “Are you sure you wanna go there Wheeler?”**  
  


who is the big spoon/little spoon - **Jonathan is the big spoon!**  
  


who gets most competitive when playing games and/or sports- **Jonathan hates sports and is a big baby so Nancy is competitive and fierce and doesn’t ever want Jonathan on her team cause the boy has no sense of winning and she NEEDS to win.**  
  


who starts the most arguments- **Nancy- Jonathan is too passive and lets Nancy walk all over him, and when she calls him out on it or tries to apologize for something bitchy she said, he acts like its fine because people usually talk to him anyway they want anyway, and then she gets mad and they start arguing.**  
  


who suggests that they buy a pet - **NANCY BEGS. Jonathan eventually takes her shopping for a kitten.**  
  


what couple traditions they have- **They go on long drives out to the edge of town and sit on the hood of Jonathans car and blast music and smoke weed and make out and talk about how  they’re going to run away from Hawkins together. (However Nancy knows he’ll never leave his family and Jonathan knows she only started dating him to make her parents angry and no matter how sweetly she says “I love you” they’re only 17 and it will never last)  
  
**

what tv shows they watch together- **they don’t watch a ton of TV, they’d rather listen to music or watch a movie, but Will got them started on Narcos and Game of Thrones.**  
  


what other couple they hang out with - **Steve and Kali cause why wouldn’t I go there? (;**  
  


how they spend time together as a couple - **Smoking weed, listening to music, cuddling, making out, driving, fucking, cooking, babysitting Will and El and Mike.**    
  


who made the first move- **Nancy because Jonathan is dense as a fucking pound cake. He notices Nancy’s flirting a bit more now but still, he wasn’t perfect.**  
  


who brings flowers home- **Jonathan. But Nancy brings Jonathan new CDs just as often.**  
  


who is the best cook- **THIS IS HARD. Shit. Ok. Let’s go with Jonathan ONLY BECAUSE they never had shit so he can make a meal out of ANYTHING. Real Talk. So I think that would make him the better cook. Also his grandmother used to own a bakery so this little dude can BAKE. And Nancy said his chocolate cake was better than an orgasm and so she always makes him make dessert and she makes her little hotdishes which are also bomb but again, when he can make Hamburger Helper taste homemade.. that’s good. But also Jonathan’s best meal is beef tips and gravy and homemade mashed potatoes and homemade biscuits - Nancy is convinced he’s trying to make her fat, And Nancy’s best meal is lasagna and garlic bread. (yes this bitch can WHIP together a fyre ass lasagna, Karen didn’t raise no bitch.)**


	24. Kalancy future ficlet

When Nancy left Hawkins she never looked back. She thought she might miss her siblings, and as often as she tried to reach out she was met with resentment from both them and her parents, so eventually she stopped. 

Joyce had always been there for her, and finally got her happily ever after, with Hopper and El and Will. 

Jonathan and Steve had married the second gay marriage became legal aka when they were twenty two. Steve said he didn’t care as long as he could drink. They had a small ceremony in Joyce’s backyard with twinkly lights and the wooden porch that Hopper built just for the occasion. 

Steve grabbed Jonathan’s ass at the ceremony as he kissed him and Will whistled. Kali squeezed Nancy’s hand extra tight and didn’t say anything when Nancy got a bit tipsy on champagne. She looked so beautiful she could have been the bride. One day she thought she would have been. To both of them. Her hair was in a low twist and she wore mauve lipstick and a white strapless sundress. 

Jonathan asks her to dance first and Kali waves her along, long past jealous of whatever happened between the three of them years ago. Nancy absolutely does not cry as he rests his hands on her waist and she congratulates him and he smiles so goddamn bright and he deserves the world. 

She does cry when she dances with Steve though. Her first love. Steve motherfucking Harrington. The first man she’d ever given all of herself too. The first man she’d ever let keep a part of her. He wipes her tears and kisses her cheek and rests their foreheads together. She can feel his pulse say, I know, I know, I know.

Now Joyce is a grandmother to a beautiful baby girl Harper, and Kali and Nancy live in an apartment on the edge of the city that they’ve barely decorated because Nancy’s still afraid even after five years. 

Kali is nervous too. Tiptoes around talks of the future. Has days where she says two words to Nancy but they always end up together in bed, curled up like a life line. Sometimes she gets so angry she breaks things or storms out of the house or cries and Nancy doesn’t think she’s coming back. Every single time. Kali always apologizes and says she’d never leave her and Nancy mostly knows that’s true but.. she has no one anymore. 

Everyone’s moving on and she’s just stuck, at 27, moving like a corpse. 

Nancy is the queen of pushing people away and she is damn good at it. She is cutting and mean and her blue eyes narrow and get cruel even though her makeup is smudged and her perfectly lined lips spit harsh words until Kali can’t help but should back, brown eyes fierce. 

They’re both terrified. Of what the future brings. If they’re gonna last. Everyone seems happy but them. Nancy’s lost without her family. Kali’s never had anyone so of course she’s clinging to Nancy, because there’s no one else to cling to. 

They’d had a huge fight the night before. Nancy’d snapped for something done and tried to push Kali away and Kali took the bait and then it ended with Nancy in tears about why didn’t Kali just leave her already, she has no more to give, nothing left to offer her, why doesn’t she just get out. 

She’s yelling and crying and her makeup is everywhere and Kali wraps her arms around her and says,   
“What do I have to say to make you believe me?” Kali asks.

Nancy just sobs into her shoulder. 

“Maybe okay will be our always?” Kali asks. 

Nancy pulls back, raising a still perfectly filled in eyebrow,   
“Really? The fault in our stars?”

Kali shrugs,   
“Or would you prefer real or not real?”

Nancy laughs,  
“The hunger games?”

“Hey, El was really into young adult.”

“And you read them, because you’re perfect.”

Kali taps her nose,  
“Far from perfect, princess.” 

“I just feel like the whole world is moving and we’re standing still.” Nancy says.

“We can do anything you want Nancy. Anything.”

“How?”

Kali pushes a lock of Nancy’s hair behind her ear,   
“Decorating our apartment. Moving into a house like adults. I know your credit score you know, we can do much better than this. We can get married. We can have a backyard wedding like Jonathan and Steve and get so drunk that we secretly puke in the bushes. And we can have s’mores instead of cake like you want. And you never have to be Nancy Wheeler again,” she squeezes her waist, “you can be Nancy Prasad.” 

Nancy blinks more tears back,   
“Really?”  
“Really.”

“And I can be your hot trophy wife and never have to get up before six am again?” Nancy asks, wrapping her arms around Kali’s neck. 

Kali shrugs,   
“You can be the hot wife, however until we win the lottery we gotta work.”

Nancy taps her chin and pretends to hesitate,  
“Um, as long as you wake me up with my coffee every morning, and get me a rock as big as my head I’ll consider it.” 

Kali stares at her,  
“Real or not real?”

Nancy rolls her eyes,  
“Real.”

And she kisses her fiancée.


	25. Cooking headcanons

Cooking headcanons: 

Nancy: so Nancy is the most complex truly, because I go back and forth on if she can cook or not. She can cook recipes from Women’s Day magazine and her grandmothers recipe book. She cooks hot dishes and pasta salads, and homemade Christmas cookies and makes the best cup of coffee in the world. She also makes a mean lasagna and Tennessee whiskey cake from scratch. Nancy likes to cook- mostly because she hates doing dishes and she has a few classic meals she’s best at. 

Steve’s favorite is her taco pasta, which she often serves with homemade biscuits (you know Karen never taught her any other way) 

Jonathan’s favorite is her homemade chocolate cake. Sometimes she makes it for him randomly and surprises him at work. His face turns red and he practically swallows the fork. 

Kali’s favorite is her chili, Kali had never had it before but Nancy’s was so good that Kali often ate multiple bowls with cornbread on top. 

The only thing is Nancy cooks hella white and hella unseasoned. Jk it doesn’t have to be unseasoned but she only knows traditional white dishes. 

Jonathan can COOK. Again he can make hamburger helper taste gourmet, and he loves to make homemade pizzas. Just like in my other Headcanon I believe he used to bake with his grandmother so he can bake. He makes homemade bread, rolls, cake, all to Nancy’s dismay because she’s scared to put on weight. For the first few months of their relationship she picks around his food, until Kali, Steve and Jonathan confront her about her eating habits. She does put on about fifteen pounds but she was so damn skinny in the first place that she truly needed it. 

Not only can Jonathan make about anything taste good but he loves cooking. It’s one thing he does well and can take care of people. (Are we sure he’s not Italian and shows his love and care through food?) anyway, so Jonathan is always cooking dinner, and in the morning, since he and Nancy are the earliest risers they share the cups of coffee and pack everyone’s lunches. It’s adorable as fuck. 

Nancy’s favorite dish of his is his enchiladas. 

Steve’s favorite dish is steak and baked potatoes with his homemade rolls and lots of butter. (Mainly because Steve can’t even START a grill.) 

Kali’s favorite dish is his spaghetti and meatballs because he makes them homemade and wtf does he put on them to make them so goddamn good. Plus he always buys the expensive shredded Parmesan to put on top cause they can afford that now and it’s wonderful. 

Steve, bless his heart but he can’t do anything. And he’s embarrassed as fuck about it. His dad never even let him make a simple batch of chocolate chip cookies with his mom. So when I say he can’t scramble eggs, he can’t. Once when they were still poor and living paycheck to paycheck, he locked himself in the bathroom and cried after he burnt 6 eggs and they didn’t get paid until the next Friday. 

Somehow Nancy snuck in, with her still tired eyes and bed head and kissed his forehead softly and vowed to teach him how to cook. So she does. She mainly does it before Jonathan and Kali are home since they work the latest and Steve is embarrassed. His best meal is breakfast for dinner, and his waffles are always perfectly crisp, and Nancy taught him a trick for less greasy bacon and less dry eggs. Everyone always gives Steve extra compliments because even though he’s never explicitly told anyone but Nancy, they know. 

Now Kali adds some color to the mix. Not only is she out here cooking the traditional Indian food but she cooks Mexican and Asian dishes as well. It’s not the other three’s fault they never got out Hawkins but sometimes she feels like if she eats another tuna hotdish she’ll die. So she cooks naan and chicken tikki masala and homemade samosa - always a double  
Batch because Steve eats them before the rest of dinner is even done. 

She makes the best chicken stir fry around and teaches Jonathan how to wrap the wontons- he least favorite part. Nancy and Steve can manage the egg rolls but the poor boy eats those before dinner is done too. 

She also makes the best sweet potato pie in the world because she got the recipe from one of her old  
Roommates grandmothers, along with a Mac and cheese and greens recipe. To her absolute shock and delight Nancy begs for greens and sweet potato pie often and Steve asks why the Mac and cheese is so good because he’s white and has never had homemade. 

Everyone generally loves cooking so they coordinate each week and then spend about two hours at the grocery store because Steve is truly  
A child. And everyone changes their pre planned meal about three times.


	26. Summer Nanny Headcanons

Wheeler Daycare Headcanons 

⁃ Nancy runs a daycare from the Wheeler house- well not really a daycare but she nannys Holly and Erica (Holly is 6, Erica is 7) all summer and the rest of the kids generally hang out there .. for multiple reasons   
⁃ One.. Nancy makes the best lunches, like they always have the best juice boxes and Nancy makes pasta salads and hotdogs and the best sandwiches with crusts cut off and her, Holly and Erica use cookie cutters to cut shapes out of watermelon or make fruit kabobs or the best rice krispie bars in the universe and never bats an eye when she has to make two pans a day   
⁃ She also hides two liters of Mountain Dew and lets the kids have one cup a day as long as they don’t tell their mom   
⁃ Two.. Nancy Sits in their front yard in a kiddy pool and tans and reads books in a sparkly pink bikini (think Elle woods) with her hair up in whatever little hair do the girls do on her in the morning, while they’re all getting dressed, with her freckles and oversized sunglasses and pink tinted lip balm and tanning oil and glimmering belly button ring.   
⁃ Erica and Holly wear their bikinis too and run a tiny lemonade stand at the end of their driveway, the two girls caked in sunscreen, with those tiny plastic chairs for when they get tired  
⁃ Anyway, Mike is super embarrassed because everyone thinks Nancy is really hot I mean DUH including Max who’s a lesbian or well she doesn’t exactly know her label yet but all she knows is Nancy is smoking hot and she pretends to like lipstick and mascara cause Nancy gets so excited talking to her about all these different eyeshadow palettes but mostly she just hears Naked   
⁃ Will doesn’t think she’s cute cause he thinks Mike is cute and wants to know why Mike is never playing with her or in a swimsuit and Mike always blushes really hard and shoves at him and El watches in fascination, before asking if their boyfriends   
⁃ Holly and Erica run a lemonade stand that Nancy helps them make and she adds a lemon wedge to every cup while Erica adds a cherry to each one, and sometimes they sell baked goods if it’s not too hot to turn on the ice   
⁃ Nancy’s supervising from her spot in the kiddie pool and of course making the girls more money cause who wouldn’t want an excuse to ogle Nancy, especially when she’s just laying out there tanning or the girls wanna join her in the pool or run through the sprinklers so she’s gotta stand at the stand in her little swimsuit cover up but then they just get even more business cause everyone wants to talk to Nancy Wheeler  
⁃ but the point is Steve, Jonathan and Kali come by DAILY and if the kids aren’t hanging at Mikes.. they’re always coming by too ESPECIALLY max and Dustin  
⁃ So we got Steve who’s a couple years older who lets Nancy buy cigarettes and alcohol from the corner store and they’ve hooked up a few times and he’s always looking fine as fuck in his little button downs and pastel colored shorts and when Nancy walks the girls down to corner store he lets them get free ice cream and help him count the change and Nancy always bends down to grab something off the lowest shelf and he’s always crouching down to the girls height and complimenting their lemonade and ruffling his hair and eyeing Nancy out of the corner of his eye to see if she’ll acknowledge him or just eye him over the corner of her book   
⁃ Jonathan comes over for Will, Will lives the farthest so he comes to bring him or pick him up and he drives a car, nothing fancy but Nancy doesn’t have one and Jonathan blushes so pretty so occasionally she’ll get out of the pool and lean against the drivers door and ask when he’s gonna give her a ride all sultry and he blushes and stutters and she invites him for some lemonade which he insists on paying the girls for, sometimes she’ll invite him in for some spiked lemonade and they sit on the porch and drink it during naptime, sometimes Steve and Jonathan are there at the same time and Nancy shamelessly flirts with them both, the three of them tipsy on too expensive vodka and too cheap lemonade   
⁃ Kali is a year above Nancy and Jonathan and always comes around too, with her purple streaks and wild hair dos. Her summer go to is a French braid with big hoop earrings and she wears crop tops and high waisted shorts that show off her curves and fucking vans even though it’s over ninety degrees. So she always buys lemonade and then sits on the grass next to Nancy and teases her about whatever book she’s reading. She makes a sly comment like, “when you’re ready to learn something that you can’t find in books you hit me up Wheeler (because apparently this is an 80s movie where they call each other by their last names) and Nancy’s face flames and Kali laughs and winks and Nancy splashes water at her which really just succeeds in wetting her white crop top so she can see her purple bra.   
⁃ One time all three of Nancy’s suitors come just as she’s cleaning up the booth for nap time. The girls are watching tv while Nancy cleans up and then it’s nap time so anyway everyone shows up around the same time and Kali’s confused, she did come for lemonade and her daily dose of Nancy Wheeler but the boys seem to know her better and ask if she has an adult lemonade, Kali teases her and pouts and asks why she’s never been invited for adult lemonade, especially when Jonathan helps her bring the stand to the garage and Steve leads Kali in the house to make the spiked lemonade. She’s jealous Steve knows Nancy so well but also inthralled by his chest hair and how he gets away with wearing his shirt cut so low.   
⁃ So it turns into a thing, at night they hang out and drink and around the bonfire the older kids have because it’s summer aka everyone practically lives at the Wheelers and flirt and when the boys go to sleep they pass around joints and the shotgun until they all just end up trading kisses with everyone 

Extras from this verse:   
⁃ Erica gets dropped off at seven am every morning and Mrs.Sinclair is greeted by Nancy still in her pajamas drinking a cup of coffee   
⁃ Most times the girls eat eggos or dry cereal in front of the tv while Nancy downs two more cups of coffee. Finally she makes them get dressed and does Holly’s hair. Mrs.Sinclair showed her how to remove Erica’s bonnet and slick and comb off her hair into a braid and then the girls do her hair. If lunch isn’t already prepared they cook lunch and then get ready to do whatever outdoor activity they wanna do for the save even though Nancy would much rather sit inside in the ac   
⁃ Though some days she can’t be bothered to force them outside so they have movie days. When they have these movie days, Nancy generally lets the boys watch and do whatever they want- while they girls are sleeping. She has a potty mouth of her own so rated r movies aren’t that serious to her so the kids crowd up the couch eating popcorn and chips and candy and drinking pop and they’re watching some random rated R movie and all of a sudden TITS are on the screen and she flips out and starts screaming and mike can’t shut up it fast enough as if these kids have never seen tits but she’s just freaking the fuck out and her face is so red and they watch nothing but PG rated movies for weeks, and she’s telling Steve, Kali and Jonathan the story the next time they’re over and Steve busts out laughing and is like “do you fucking know what pornhub is?” And Nancy’s like they do not watch porn and Kali’s like “fuck yeah they do” and Nancy’s like WTF I can’t handle this so yeah no more rated r movies


	27. Fairytale Stoncy AU

-Steve and Nancy are locked away together .. someone messes up and they’re both locked in the tower together and they braid each other’s hair because they rarely administer Steve haircuts.

-Jonathan was always told he’d never be good enough to do anything but when his brother is kidnapped he has no choice to go take over the castle

-Jonathan saves Nancy the lost princess and Steve and he finds out its her castle.

-Steve and Nancy face Jonathan in royal clothes and thank him for saving them like they didn’t kiss him and cry when they saw him

\- the three of them dance at a ball and get drunk on champagne and take a whole cake upstairs to their bedroom to drunkenly eat and Jonathan grows his hair to shoulder length so they can braid it too


	28. Staloncy Driving

who in your polyship can drive? who in your polyship can do all the mechanical stuff, changing oil and doing brake jobs? who in your polyship is completely helpless and can’t even remember to check their oil? whose car is a mess of fast food wrappers and soda cans? whose car is spotless? who drives the minivan and is always filling it with junk from thrift stores/yard sales? 

Okay so Nancy can drive but not well aka you nearly die everytime you’re in her car because she listens to music too loud and drinks iced coffee and applies liquid lipstick and cannot parallel park and makes too sharp of turns. 

Jonathan can actually drive really well, and so can Kali. However Steve drives so horribly that it’s not even worth having him drive, it took him 4 times to pass the fucking test and they’re all pretty sure they’d just wanted him to stop fucking coming back. 

Jonathan can change oil and do brake jobs, and Kali is fascinated and wants to learn. Nancy’s acrylics cost too much and Steve’s too pretty (his words). 

Nancy doesn’t even know how to check any of the fluids in her car, and can’t even get the hood to lift up by herself because why the fuck does she have to do extra stuff when she already PRESSED THE BUTTON GODDAMMIT. Again, Steve doesn’t drive, and the other two are much better at checking things than Nancy. Nancy wouldn’t even pump her own gas if you allowed her to not. 

Kali’s car is a mess, like a legit mess, Steve loves riding in it because you can just throw your trash everywhere. Nancy’s car is full of sugar packets from Starbucks but she never lets anyone ELSE leave trash in her car. 

Riding in Jonathan’s car is like riding with your grandma because it’s so spotless it’s eerie and you’re scared to move or touch anything at all. 

No one drives a mini van but Jonathan is always filling his car with random shit they absolutely do not need and buying hella shit, and when Steve is with him it’s even worse.


	29. Youtuber!Nancy

Imagine Nancy Wheeler who’s a beauty guru on YouTube and like the baddest bitch of all truly and she does like makeovers for kids. And WOC. And she’s dating Kali cause why not? Kali is a tattoo artist and Nancy regularly cuts her side cut and colors her hair different colors, but she has to beg Kali to do her makeup, especially on camera.

Her followers always want her to do Kali’s hair or makeup and Kali had only been in one makeup tutorial so far and then people were asking for Nancy to show how she does Kali’s hair. She’s always got about 800 thousand requests for a Q and A but Kali is wary of it. She’s fairly private but Nancy is very open with her followers and very open about being a queer woman but how it’s different than Kali because she’s white.

Since Kali knows this, she vlogs her proposal to Nancy. It’s sooooo adorable and Nancy is shocked that Kali hid her camera behind the napkin holder because of course she proposes over dinner- Nancy’s favorite expensive wine and her moms spicy curry and samosa recipe that Nancy loves and eats until she’s sick even though once Kali had went into a very long angry rant while high about how much time it took her to make each single samosa compared to how fast Nancy can eat them. It makes Nancy laugh and cover her face in embarrassment.

But anyway she doesn’t kneel, but she does start her little speech and hands Nancy a beautiful teardrop halo set ring and asks her to be her wife.

Jonathan and Steve have a daughter who is a huge fan of a Nancy and Nancy holds a meet and greet and they take her and they all hit it off. Their daughter is adorable and Jonathan totally throws Steve under the bus that he watches her videos without their daughter half the time.

Kali of course is standing in the corner of Sephora about to have a breakdown at so many screaming people most of whom wanna talk to her too and she’s like what the hell. Anyway so of course their daughter - Margaret who’s 12- wants to meet Kali, so they go over there and Kali is talking to Jonathan about his half sleeve tattoo and she likes them so she invites them back to their hotel for drinks later, Jonathan is apprenticing at a local tattoo shop and she thinks their cute and their daughter is adorable and it seems like Steve keeps hitting on her but she doesn’t understand except she kinda does cause she’s poly too.

And yeah staloncy love and coparenting!


	30. Kalancy Relationship Ask

How do they cheer each other up?

So in order to cheer Kali up, who always gets more angry than sad, it takes kind of a lot of effort. Her first instinct is always to push Nancy away and be mean, yelling, which Nancy hates and physically pushing her away. One time she pushed Nancy into a bookcase on accident, and it was the first time Nancy ever saw her cry. So she goes about it differently now. She will go to the kitchen and make hot chocolate or brownies, turn on Parks and Rec, something Kali finds utterly hilarious. Lets her hair down or slides on one of Kali’s shirts and spreads out on the couch until Kali comes and sits by her. Tucks herself into Nancy’s side and plays with her hair that’s always soft and always smells fruity. And The warmth of Nancy’s body and her own plaid shirt, the oven blasting heat across their small apartment, and the scent of baked goods wafting through the apartment. Kali barely lets Nancy get up when the timer goes off. Creeps behind her, holding onto the tail end of her shirt, arms tucked inside near the bare skin of her waist, as Nancy pulls the brownies out of the oven. She gets out a plastic bowl and the ice cream and makes them one decadent sundae, with one spoon. She never really would eat with Kali, but recently she’d taken to letting Kali feed her. They resume their spot on the couch and Kali tucks herself into Nancy’s neck, doesn’t move to eat at all. So Nancy eats obnoxiously and moans and smacks and licks the spoon obnoxiously and goes on and on about what a good cook she is until Kali grabs the bowl from her just to shut her the hell up and shoves a huge bite in her mouth only to grumble, “I’ve had better” and Nancy laughs and smirks around her own bite, grinning even though there’s crumbs on the left side of her mouth and just shakes her head, “No you haven’t.” To which Kali takes the bowl and eats the rest of the sundae and doesn’t let Nancy up to get more, sits on her feet, her weight all but holding Nancy down until finally Nancy stops struggling and Kali stops snarking, exhaling softly onto Nancy’s collarbone while Nancy cards a hand through her hair, as the next episode plays.

Now Nancy is a bit different. When she’s upset, she’s depressed. After struggling with her mental health her whole life, nothing exactly getting better before it got worse again, and she’s used to being alone. Much more comfortable comforting someone else than someone comforting her. So Kali starts small. Offers to shower with Nancy. Do her hair. Gives her a crooked braid or burns herself with the curling iron more times than she can bare, but she refuses to stop. Finally Nancy’s hair is curled and Nancy teaches her how to put her clips in to pull her hair back and Kali smiles widely even though Nancy doesn’t, because at least she looks a bit more herself. Well more herself then she did before, with her hair in a greasy bun at the nape of her neck. Kali is useless at makeup. Only good at her own messy smuged eyeliner, nothing like Nancy’s sharp thin cat eye, or perfectly arched and colored in eyebrows, all she can manage is lipstick. So she turns Nancy around and applies her mauve lipstick to Nancy’s slightly dry lipstick and smiles. Nancy’s got a pimple on her cheek and her eyes still look tired but she looks better than before. Less flat. Less like a ghost just waiting to waft away. The color makes her look a bit better and although she doesn’t smile at Kali right away, she knows she feels better. She forces Nancy to get dressed. In her old clothes, but at least fresh clothes. It’s not like Kali’s gonna force her to do anything. But she needs fresh clothes and deodorant after her shower. So she gives Nancy an old band tee and some underwear as she sits on the bed and she changes wordlessly. Kali changes too and moves them out onto the couch. Nancy doesn’t really care to watch TV, so Kali turns on something random and pulls Nancy into her lap. They won’t move until Kali has to order food, because Nancy’s the chef in their house, not Kali. But she’ll order food later. Probably Chinese. Because Nancy will eat a lot of that without thinking, mindlessly shoving wontons in her mouth while she waves chopsticks at the TV, because by then she’ll be sick of Kali’s obsession with Hoarders and make them watch some cheesy heterosexual white romance. Because that’s what she grew up on. And it’s not like Kali had ever seen them, so she tucks her face into Nancy’s shoulder, her fruity hair and cries as they watch The Notebook and Nancy cries too, pretends she’s crying about the movie and not about how grateful she is for her girlfriend.

Who makes the other smile with almost no effort at all?

I’m gonna say Nancy. Kali has never really had like.. Happiness right. She’s used to be angry and hurt and letting the pain suffer and only dealing with it by anger and hurting. Others or herself. So Nancy just.. Makes her smile so goddamn much because she’s effortless. She’s funny. She’s hilarious and sarcastic and biting and witty, always making a smart ass comment before she can stop herself. She’s beautiful. Always spending hours in the bathroom getting ready while Kali watches her, never saying anything, even when they’re in danger of running late, and then Nancy will turn to her and tell her to stop rushing her, she’s almost done and Kali just laughs and smiles and goes to warm up the car. Kali makes her smile when she obnoxiously narrates exactly what she’s doing in the kitchen, trying to explain to Kali she’s trying to teach her how to cook but really she’s narrating like Rachel Ray. Or when she’s drunk and tries to force Kali to stand next to her on the couch so they can have a dance party. Or when she wakes up and Nancy’s still sleeping. Kali’s face hurts from smiling so much.


	31. Kalancy Fluff

Nancy is not expecting it when she walks in the apartment, and Kali is laying in the middle of their bed, in a T-shirt and underwear, red solo cup in her hand,

“Nancy!” She slurs, jumping up, the liquid in her cup sloshing over their wood floor as she bounces over to Nancy, clearly drunk.

 

Their studio apartment is tiny so by the time Nancy sets her purse down and kicks off her shoes, Kali has reached her and kisses her softly. She tastes like tequila.

 

“Come sit with me, please, please,” Kali says, tugging Nancy forward.

 

Nancy takes her hand and Kali hands her the cup which she downs the other half, wincing as Kali yanks at her clothes. Nancy falls on the bed, in just her bralette and underwear and Kali wraps her arms around Nancy’s back, kissing her neck.

 

“Has it been a bad day?” Nancy asks as Kali twines a hand through her hair and pushes a thigh through hers.

 

“No, no. I’m fine.”

 

“Fine?” Nancy asks.

 

“Yeah, can’t I just get drunk in my own damn apartment?”

 

“Yes, but usually I’m invited,” Nancy turns her head slightly to pout and Kali laughs and kisses her nose,

 

“Well someone was working too hard today. So I had to start without you. Now I just wanna cuddle.”

 

Nancy tucks her head into Kali’s chest and pecks her collarbone,

“Well here I am.”

 

Kali kisses her forehead and tightens her arms around her back, pressing Nancy harder against her,

“Right where you belong.”


	32. Kalanathan Fluffy Love

It’s one of those shitty, rare weeks where they don’t have any of the same days off. Kali is Sunday and Thursday and Jonathan is Tuesday and Saturday. Jonathan has a closing shift when Kali has an opening shift and vice versa. 

It makes for a long week of chores not getting done, mostly laundry and dishes, eating out and just general exhaustion. By the time they wind up seeing the other, they’re too tired to do much but give a lazy, half hearted, open mouthed kiss, smoke, or turn on some Netflix in bed before either one passes out. The week generally ends with one of them having to wear barely decent outfits, or something dirty, and them picking fights over stupid shit. It’s annoying. Yet every time one of these weeks happen their life falls apart, albeit for only a week. 

By the next week it’s nothing they can’t manage, using one of their days off to tackle the chores, and then do something they actually want to do. So it’s Saturday and Kali’s day has been hell. Customers were rude and demanding even more so than usual, and she’d had no clean clothes, so she was forced to stuff herself into a pair of skinny jeans that were a bit too tight and a bright red peasant top she found unflattering. She’s just ready to crawl into her bed and get high and eat an entire bag of Doritos. It’s her right. 

She pulls open the door to the apartment and see Jonathan standing at the stove. He’s shirtless, just wearing a pair of flannel pajama bottoms, and he glances over his shoulder and smiles, 

“Hey babe.” 

Kali sets her bag down and stares, 

“Is that french toast?” 

He nods,   
“Yeah, bacon’s in the oven. I’ll do the eggs in a minute, I figured we could have breakfast for-” 

He’s cut off by Kali striding towards him, standing up on her tiptoes and kissing him softly. She cups his face softly and sighs into his mouth, and she feels his teeth as he smiles against her lips, pulling away, 

“I love you so much,” she says, bouncing down onto her flat feet. 

He laughs at that, pushes his hair out of his face and flips the french toast, 

“I know, breakfast for dinner is your favorite.” 

And she doesn’t say it often. She doesn’t know why. All she’s been through it’s.. Hard. Jonathan is the type to need words. He wants to be told what to do, wants to be told he’s appreciated and loved and cared for. And Kali tries, she does. But it’s easier to show ‘I love you’ with different things. Her body, her eye rolling, letting him pick a movie or cooking him breakfast or constantly stocking the cupboard with his favorite cereal instead of her own. Those things mean something to Jonathan, they do, or they wouldn’t have made it this far, but it makes her feel horrible, deep down, that he’d thought she was just saying it because of the dinner. 

“No. I meant, I love you. I care about you so fucking much. I adore you. You are perfect. You are one of the greatest people I know. You are the best man I know,” she says softly, staring at the cluster of moles on his shoulder. 

She can feel him staring at her, and when she doesn’t move or say anything else, he walks towards her and wraps his arms around her. Everything else fades away. Her shitty work day, the fact she’d been up since 6am. The fact the house was a mess, she had no laundry. The fact she had to be to work at 9am the next day. Nothing except Jonathan. Her rock. Someone who loved her so endlessly. Who gave her hope that somehow things would work out. How could someone know Jonathan and not believe in everything good in the world?

 

Their hug breaks as the timer goes off and Jonathan slowly lets go of her, she lets her hands slide off his soft, bare skin, 

“Don’t you dare burn my french toast though,” she says, voice thick with emotion. 

Jonathan just laughs at her and flips the french toast while she grabs a pair of oven mitts so she can take out the bacon, 

“I wouldn’t dream of it. “


	33. Jancy Phone Sex

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nancy and Jonathan have phone sex, with multiple orgasms.

Ok so real quick- Nancy has a high ass sex drive. Like she loves masturbating and sex. Especially alone, she’ll orgasm until she physically can’t anymore, for whatever reason, she’ll get a really bad cramp, her clit will be too sensitive, she’ll start crying, or just get tired. She knows how to tease herself, how much recovery time she needs before orgasms, etc.

If there’s one person who’s shocked her sexually, it’s Jonathan. It’s a Saturday night and they’re on the phone, something she’s never thought he’d be okay with. But she’s got her favorite vibrator on her clit and she’s ready to come already. They’d just started, but she’d tried to explain to him, that she needs just one to take the edge off and one is never, ever, enough.

She’s in the middle of explaining to Jonathan how much she wants his lips wrapped around her clit and his long fingers rubbing his g-spot, she’s so empty, so wet, so fucking turned on and horny for him, hasn’t had anything besides her own fingers in her for so fucking long when her orgasm takes her by surprise.

She hitches in a breath her stomach tightening, pussy clenching, so fucking empty, whining his name, and then it’s over. She’s still turned on, needs more, and whines as much to Jonathan, moving the vibrator off her clit, as if he can sense what she’s doing, he says,  
“Wait, can you, keep it on? I know you like to come more than once, but like, without stopping?”

Her stomach tightens,  
“Okay,”

There’s a slight zing of sensitivity, but it wasn’t that high before, and a mere twenty seconds later it turns to toe curling pleasure. Jonathan’s going on about how he can’t wait to get inside her, wants to know what it feels like, how she’ll feel so much better than his hand and she’s coming. She can’t hold in the screech that bubbles out of her throat in shock as she comes.. again.

She can hear Jonathan grunting across the phone line, the slick sounds of his hand speeding up and by the time she hears him groan her name in pleasure she’s coming again, the ache in her pussy so deep as she arches her back so hard she gets a cramp in her calf and she tries to muffle her scream. By the time she comes down, pussy sensitive but only in a way that she wants to know what it would feel like to have a tongue ran across it at this very moment, she drops the vibrator, still buzzing, and the phone, and wipes the tears out of her eyes with her forearm. It’s not until her vision comes back, Be it slightly blurry, that she hears her name being called.

She picks up the phone,  
“Nancy, holy fuck, are you okay?”

“Get over here, now,” she all but growls, not recognizing her own voice.

“But-“

“My window’s unlocked, I’ll be waiting.”


	34. Random Staloncy Headcanons

Nancy hates cutting fruit, her mother hated it so from like 12 and up, Nancy had to cut all the fruit in their house, and it was a lot. She’d rather choke than cut another watermelon, so Jonathan cuts all the fruits (and veggies) for her.  
⁃ Steve doesn’t drink coffee, he always has an abundance of energy anyway, but his parents always drank coffee, so he wakes up and makes Nancy and Jonathan coffee, mainly because they can’t function without it and their sleepy eyes always light up in surprise  
⁃ Nancy loves pickles and Jonathan always gives her his pickle from the cafe when they order sandwiches  
⁃ Jonathan is very big on donating, he got a lot of his stuff from thrift stores and goodwill, so every season he makes everyone go through their clothes. He however, cannot go through his own clothes because Nancy and Steve get upset and try to save everything, insisting no that’s they’re favorite sweater or those jeans make his ass look good, or they need another one of his plain white T-shirt’s to sleep in. The only one who doesn’t do this is Kali, so they usually give Steve and Nancy some money and tell them to pick up dinner before quickly going through Jonathan’s clothes. However one time, Kali picks up a soft gray Henley and asks to keep it. It’s a bit snug for Jonathan and he’s just tired of it, he’s trying to brighten his wardrobe and he certainly doesn’t need it, but Kali looks so sheepish and never asks for anything that Jonathan can’t help but blush and stutter out, “yes”. Needless to say it’s few days later, when Kali comes out in his Henley and a pair of leggings, a flannel tied around her waist and her combat boots, and Steve and Nancy are incredibly jealous, but Jonathan can’t help but smile at the way the too big shirt slides down over her collarbone.  
⁃ Nancy’s favorite form of self care is to get drunk in her bathtub. Usually she doesn’t intend to start out getting drunk, but the next thing she knows she’s drank 4/6 beers in the pack and has to call someone to help her get out because she can’t stand. And they can’t afford for her to slip and get a brain injury. So anyway they go through a phase where they buy her bath bombs and bath salts and a new loofah and different shower gels, etc.  
⁃ Nancy hates driving (so does Steve) so Jonathan is pretty much the designated driver. However if they ever go out to a club or concert, they take an Uber because drunk Jonathan is everyone’s favorite thing in the world.  
⁃ Kali is the fastest cleaner, somehow when her and Nancy decide its time to clean the house, it’s done within hours and then the two boys make them lunch and dinner  
⁃ Everyone’s family is shitty except Jonathan’s. They spend every holiday there, when they’re not making their own traditions together  
⁃ Nancy wears flavored lipgloss like she’s in middle school cause Steve likes to kiss it off  
⁃ Nancy’s feet are very small, and she can’t share with Kali which is pretty devastating to her so her favorite thing to buy is shoes and everyone spoils her with shoes. (She still cycles them out every time it’s time to donate though)  
⁃ At least once a month they have their siblings over for a sleepover night.


	35. Nancy Pregnancy Headcanons

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So I just wanna write some Mom!Nancy headcanons, these are for no particularly ship just the love of my life Nancy. And this got out of control so this is really just new mom! Nancy.

Nancy has wanted to be a mom since she was like 12. She never fantasized much about her wedding or getting married, she always fantasized about having a baby of her own.  
⁃ By the time she was in high school she kept a notebook of baby names, and it was full. There were so many names she was in love with and she always jokingly told her friends that her partner wasn’t allowed to have any say  
⁃ It’s always been her goal to be a young hot mom, she wants to wear matching outfits with her baby and do the most, everyone laughs at her but it’s mainly because of the way Karen raised her and their closeness, that dropped off once Mike was born  
⁃ She wants kids so bad that she’s so scared she’ll never be able to have them because so much has already been taken from her that she stays up many nights after she’s gotten into a serious relationship praying that it’ll be possible  
⁃ She only realizes because she was supposed to get her period over their vacation and she was pissed- begged her partner to reschedule but it was already planned and they get there and she still doesn’t have her period, so she hunts down a pharmacy which isn’t easy because she’s one of /those/ white people who barely speaks Spanish, she relies on her partner to do most of the talking for her, and she buys one test and gets the key to the bathroom and it’s positive. But it could be a mistake. So she goes it and buys two more. Then two more. And the kind woman at the counter stops her from buying another one and says, “congratulations” in a heavy accent and Nancy bursts into tears and the lady gives her a chocolate bar and Nancy eats the whole thing on the way back to the hotel  
⁃ Her partner is still in bed, Nancy was supposed to wake them up so they can go eat and drink margaritas and sit in the pool all day but they’re sleeping so peacefully and Nancy is fucking pregnant and tears well in her eyes again as she makes a cup of decaf coffee and she sits on the patio in her pajamas and drinks until her partner wakes up and comes and kisses her shoulder and asks why she didn’t wake them up and is there more coffee, so she brews them some regular coffee and they drink it but when it starts to get warm on the porch as the sun shifts, they drag her back into the air conditioning and into the king size bed. They push up her shirt to rest their arm across their stomach and kiss her shoulder and she rests her hand over theirs, “does anything feel different?” She asks intertwining their fingers. “No, why? Should it?” She nods slightly, “there’s a baby in there,” “A WHAT?” And they jump up and pick Nancy up and hug her and pull her into their arms and start jumping on the bed screaming “my wife is PREGNANT”  
⁃ Nancy is the cutest pregnant person you’ve ever seen. All tummy, and one of those ones that starts showing early and you wanna ask if she’s having twins she’s so big, she glows and her cheeks are plump and red, and towards the end she needs her partner to help keep her steady  
⁃ She reads all the parenting books and her partner thinks it’s adorable because she’s going to be the best mom in the whole world- they promise her  
⁃ She downloads an app on both of their phones that says how big the baby is each week and her partner always sends her an update  
⁃ She always has cravings for pickles from her favorite deli, corn nuts and pretzel m and ms.  
⁃ Her partner has also spent many a nights being woken up from a DEAD sleep to go get Nancy McDonalds fries and a Wendy’s frosty.. dead sleep  
⁃ Gender reveal parties are dumb and super heterosexual so they don’t have one, instead Nancy begs her partner to agree to let them find out and she cries when she finds out it’s a little girl  
⁃ Her partner laughs at this little tiny Target notebook that Nancy’s had since high school that’s filled with baby names but sits and looks through it to help her  
⁃ Eventually she gets so big she can’t put her shoes on and she always lays on her back and shakes her feet at her partner to slide her shoes on and they laugh at her and kiss her toes  
⁃ Also her partner paints her toes when she can’t reach cause we know she’s high maintenance  
⁃ She goes into labor two weeks early, on December 21st. They were getting ready to attend a work Christmas party and her water broke while wearing a $200 red sequined dress that her boss had picked out for her, and insists her partner help her get it off though they just spent 30 minutes getting it on her  
⁃ She’s kind as can be and doesn’t want drugs and her partner is scared she’s going to stab someone in the leg, especially when her fake eyelash twitches, but she doesn’t, she doesn’t yell or scream, but she does cry and huddle into her partner and say she doesn’t think she can do this. They reassure all her doubt and help her pull her hair back from her face and concentrate because their little girl is coming and she’s the strongest person they’ve ever known and she can do it.  
⁃ Their daughter, Amelia Waverly is born after 7 hours of labor and Nancy is sweating and crying and her partner is crying and a little red bundle of flailing limbs and screaming lungs is placed on her chest and she brushes a piece of the wet brown hair off of the tiny soft forehead and Amelia hiccups one last cry and opens her big blue eyes and Nancy starts crying even harder  
⁃ They have to take her away to clean her of course and a nurse has to force her to stay seated with the promise she’ll be back momentarily  
⁃ Nancy has a hard time letting Amelia go after that so her partner peels off their shirt too and climbs in next to Nancy for new skin to skin contact  
⁃ Nancy’s parents and her partners parents had been at the hospital and so eventually they get it together enough to get dressed and invite them in to hold their new granddaughter, and niece  
⁃ Mike is hollering at the fact she has a face full of makeup on - of course it didn’t sweat off during labor she uses Urban Decay setting spray thank you very much and he turns to her partner and says “are you sure you’re ready for two of her?”  
⁃ Except for her bright blue eyes, the baby looks more like her partner  
⁃ Since she hadn’t taken any drugs she can walk around and do things normally so she makes her partner walk the halls with her to keep her from hogging the baby  
⁃ She insists the baby sleeps in their room and she stands for nearly an hour just looking at her until her partner comes and wraps their arms around her waist and gives her a kiss, “it’s time for bed baby. We’re going to be tired for the next eighteen years” and Nancy laughs and they curl up on the uncomfortable hospital bed together until Amelia wakes up


	36. Stoncy NSFW Headcanons

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically… I’m a disgusting person)

Okay so Steve is a big cumslut. Like huge. He loves swallowing, and giving blowjobs, mostly because he likes being told he’s good. In addition to that, he loves eating Jonathan’s come out of Nancy. The taste of them together, watching it drip out of her, he’s obsessed with it. It’s probably his favorite thing in the world. Jonathan really likes to come on Steve’s face. Steve gets desperate and uses his fingers to scrape as much of it off as he can, and then shoves it in his mouth. Nancy helps gather the rest and push it into his mouth with her tongue.

F = Favourite Position (This goes without saying. Will probably include a visual)

Nancy on all fours with Steve fucking her face and Jonathan fucking her. OR even better, the three of them kneeling, Steve in her ass and Jonathan in her pussy is Nancy’s favorite. Jonathan’s favorite is either Nancy or Steve on top. Steve’s favorite is face down ass up, or missionary with Nancy, because it reminds him of their first time… aww.

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…)

Steve is clingy. He begs for sex and pouts if he doesn’t get it. He likes it rough, likes to be manhandled and manipulated, but even as they’re making him hurt they murmur sweet nothings in his ear. Nancy is kind and knows exactly what to say. Jonathan is more nervous, but it’s truly adorable. Nancy’s thing is kissing. If she’s not kissing your mouth, she’s peppering kisses all over your body. Jonathan is like candles and rose petals on the floor like twice a month, doesn’t matter if he’s eating your ass on them, it’s romantic dammit.

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)

Stevie my boy. He used to have really good stamina until they started having really kinky sex. He craves subspace and touch constantly, and his love language is physical touch. He comes super easily, especially when he gets overwhelmed but he usually comes twice. Unless they’re torturing him and seeing how long it takes for him to come dry. Otherwise he’d asked for a cock ring, and he wears it a lot.  
Jonathan lasts longer than Steve, but is still building up his stamina. He’s usually pretty tired after one round, but there’s been a couple of times that he’s come twice. Otherwise he usually just watches the other two go at it.  
Nancy lasts the longest and has the most orgasms. At a minimum she has to have two. “Or what’s the point?” she asks when Steve and Jonathan are like what the fuck. But yeah our girl will prolong her orgasm to make the boys come first so she can tease them. Always in a loving way. They use that as an excuse to eat her out until she can’t come anymore, or hold a vibrator on her clit until she begs them to stop.

Aftercare: 

Okay so they have some kinky sex, like life affirming like kinky ass sex. Nancy typically doms, but sometimes Jonathan helps, or both the boys are subs. Nancy is amazing at aftercare. Jonathan still likes to follow directions. So she instructs him to drink the water or help her clean up Steve with the rag, or help her. He’s more quiet, twitchy like he doesn’t know when or where to touch. Eventually Nancy forces him into a cuddle, but he more awkwardly kneels like he doesn’t quite know where he belongs. Steve is so deep in subspace he can’t move or talk or do anything but whine for the other’s to keep touching him. He just wants cuddles and love and kisses and backrubs and to lay on Nancy’s chest while Jonathan brackets him against their warmth.

NO:

Steve: Hates handcuffs or any restraints  
Nancy: Doesn’t like humiliation or degradation  
Jonathan: Doesn’t like being the center of attention or getting denied an orgasm

Kink:  
Steve: Big submissive kink - always calling Jonathan and Nancy ma’am and sir, loves being told what to do and having his orgasms controlled.  
Nancy: Loves having her nipples played with until they’re sore or deepthroating, she’s really into the idea of fisting, but they haven’t gotten there yet, but nothing gets her off faster than the boys talking about it.  
Jonathan: loves the idea of being used from both ends, Steve fucking him while Nancy sits on his face.

Wildcard:  
They love fucking in public. Like at night in a parking lot, in Steve’s pool, in the field back by the river, in Steve’s living room with the blinds open in the middle of the day. The movie theater, the bleachers under the school, etc.


	37. Jancy NSFW Headcanons

Intimacy:

Jonathan is so fucking tender. A lot of it comes from inexperience, he wants Nancy to teach him where and how to touch. He tends to let Nancy take the lead. Mostly because he chubs up at just a few wet kisses. Nancy knows this. Teases him. Gets him riled up and tries to convince her to jerk him off in random places. (Eventually he caves). But he loves the intimacy of it. Of touching Nancy’s body. He loves when Nancy rides him, skating her fingers over his back, when she looks so blissed out, riding him with no other intent than to get herself off. How her face flushed and sweat beads at her forehead and she bites her lip. He always tells her how beautiful she is, how good she feels. He tries to make it last. Distracts himself by kissing patterns on her skin.

Motivation: 

For Jonathan almost anything Nancy does turns him on. He gets hard at anything slightly suggestive. Mainly he loves Nancy in lace, so she purposefully starts wearing bralettes with lace at the top so it just pokes above her tank tops. Jonathan likes when she looks up at him from under her lashes and licks her lips because it reminds him of the first time she sucked his dick. He’d come in under two minutes, fucked into her throat rudely but he couldn’t stop, even when she gagged. Nancy loves Jonathan’s hands. Especially since he doesn’t know what he’s doing. His huge hands, long, thin fingers, that curl inside her just right as he fingers her. He’s always wringing his hands together or smoothing his shirt or just playing with his fingers and it gets Nancy so damn wet.  
Yearning: Nancy’s insatiable. Jonathan’s sex drive comes and goes but Nancy knows how to get him hard in two seconds flat and she takes advantage. Sometimes she just wants to rub him off in his jeans and watch him fall apart. Shove her hand down her skirt as soon as he’s done, sucking on her fingers and humping his thigh. 

A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)

Ok, so I headcanon they can get a little kinky, and so Nancy would dom. Jonathan is always tired, but especially after sex. He’s finally at peace, sated and relieved. He loves the feeling of a warm body against Nancy’s. He likes to play with her hair and kiss her softly, letting her trace patterns on his chest. She always lets him fall asleep first. Nancy’s always hungry. Jonathan will be like wiping the come off his stomach and suddenly Nancy’s there with a bag of chips like, “Do you want some?” And then she cuddles him until he falls asleep.

B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Jonathan’s favorite part of his own body is his hands. They’re big and strong and have done a lot in his life. He knows Nancy likes them too so that helps. As much as he would love to say it’s something like Nancy’s eyes, it’s her tits. They’re small. Don’t even fill his hands but they’re perky with a beautiful pink nipple that beg to be bitten.  
Nancy’s favorite part of her body is her calves. They’re strong and muscular and look good in heels and makes her butt look amazing. Her favorite part of Jonathan’s body is his hands. They’re big and strong and can cradle her head or thigh.

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically… I’m a disgusting person)

Jonathan loves to come inside Nancy. He loves feeling her bare against him and he always comes so fast. Afterwards he’ll eat the come out of her until she comes on his face.

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Jonathan’s biggest secret or kink, is that he likes anal as well. He fingers himself and comes so hard that he can’t even think. He hasn’t even told Nancy yet, but he wishes he could take one of her dildos and use it on himself.  
Nancy’s dirty secret is that she wants to suck Jonathan off in a public bathroom. That’s her biggest fantasy and she dirty talks about it all the time.

E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)

Jonathan is less experienced than Nancy. Nancy’s only had Steve, but truly Steve was the king of oral sex tbh. So Jonathan doesn’t have any experience, but is eager to learn. It’s hard to work on his stamina, it’s a bit too hard for him to get her off during actual penetrative sex, but he always fingers her or eats her out afterwards. Nancy generally leads the pace and shows him how she wants it, but once she starts her pace, he can match her very well.

F = Favourite Position (This goes without saying. Will probably include a visual)

Nancy loves riding Jonathan’s cock, bouncing on it, with his eyes on her like she’s amazing. Jonathan likes missionary, only because he loves bracketing his body on Nancy’s and watching her face.

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)

Omg, they’re funny. Nancy will be riding his cock and they start talking about something random, like a tv show and suddenly they’re laughing and discussing everything. They get distracted, just wrapped up in each other.

H = Hair (How well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)

Jonathan trims his hair, but not often, and Nancy gets monthly bikini waxes.

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…)

They are super romantic. It’s constant life affirming sex all the time. Soft and sweet but even when they’re being kinky, they’re constantly murmuring at each other that they love each other. Jonathan talks about Nancy’s appearance cause he knows she’s insecure. Tells her she’s pretty and he loves her hair and body and how good she feels around him.

J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)

Okay so Jonathan loves jacking off and has done it since like age twelve. He’s always been super quiet, and his mom never really had the sex talk with him because she didn’t know what to say, but when he’s fifteen she gives him a box of condoms. His bed squeaks so his shower is his best bet, or he likes to fuck quietly into his tight fist until he comes all over himself. Lately he’s been into fingering himself, just one or two with his fist tight around the head of his dick. He’s quiet, sweaty and bites his lips until they bleed so no one hears them.  
Nancy loves masturbating. She gets off at least once a day, but she likes coming multiple times in a row. She just shoves her hand down her panties and rubs her clit until she comes. She also has a vibrator she uses so she can finger herself easier. She’s so loud, panting and moaning and thrashing all over the bed. When people are home, she’s on her stomach, mouth buried in her pillow, humping her hand.

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)

Okay so Jonathan has a huge praise kink. He loves having his hair ruffled and being called a good boy. He also loves when Nancy wears lingerie or lace bras and panties.  
Nancy likes to roleplay, mostly student/teacher and she really really wants to try public sex.

L = Location (Favourite places to do the do)

Nancy always wants to do it in public places, but she settles for in Jonathan’s car, riding him, all their clothes still on, him panting in her neck, otherwise she likes to do it in their basement, the only place they’re allowed to be alone in her house.  
Jonathan likes to do it in his room or on his couch, but really he wants Nancy everywhere and all the time.

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)

Nancy loves when Jonathan gets animated talking about stuff he likes, and flails his hands around, or when he rubs at his neck or stomach, or tells her something particularly funny and his whole body shakes next to her.  
Jonathan loves when Nancy traces her neckline, the sides of her breasts or down her body, and she does it all the time to tease him.

N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Jonathan doesn’t like handcuffs or restraints, and Nancy doesn’t like being dominated.

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)

JONATHAN LOVES TO EAT PUSSY. Nancy happily sits on his motherfucking face. He is good at it too. Nancy loves giving blow jobs mostly because Jonthan is so fucking useless and looks so fucking blown away all the time. So she chokes on his dick until he’s cross eyed.

P = Pace (Are they fats and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)

Fast and rough because Nancy wants bruises and sore muscles and sex hair and swollen lips and wants to come as much and as soon as possible.

Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)  
Oh fuck yes. Quickies in the car, or the bathroom before Nancy’s parents come up to say it’s time for dinner. Jonathan always looks thoroughly wrecked and Nancy teases him forever .

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)  
Since Nancy loves the idea of public sex I’m going to say yes. They want to experiment and try new things and they’re so open and honest with each other.

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)  
Jonathan can only do one round and needs a little bit longer to recover. He still is working up his stamina but he always gets Nancy off at least twice. Mostly while he’s getting her off then he can get hard again.

T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)  
Nancy has a vibrator that’s really nice. She uses it on herself constantly, or on Jonathan’s nipples. Jonathan really wants a dildo and of course Nancy is gonna comply!

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)  
NANCY IS A HUGE TEASE. Y’all ever seen edging porn? That’s Nancy.

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)  
Nancy is super loud, moaning Jonathan’s name or just whimpering. Jonathan is fairly quiet except for when he comes, then he usually grunts or calls out Nancy’s name quietly.

W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice)  
Nancy likes to sit at the end of the bed and make Jonathan stroke himself and say at least one thing he wants that night before she’ll touch him.

X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words)  
Jonathan is lowkey packing. A couple inches more than average and on the thin side.

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)  
Nancy wants sex all the time, practically begs Jonathan for it. Jonathan has a high sex drive as well, but he’s more embarrassed about it so mostly Nancy initiates sex.

Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)  
Jonathan falls asleep first and Nancy takes care of him, playing with his hair until he falls asleep on her chest and they sleep naked together.


	38. Steve NSFW Headcanons

A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)  
Steve is a sleepy boy. He is good at fucking, can last quite awhile, and likes pleasing his partner, so he tires himself out. He generally needs to relax between fucking sessions, and tends to like to have sex like two or three times a night, because ya know they only have so many times to have sex when no one’s home. So anyway, he gets pretty tired and he loves cuddling. He likes to sleep naked and he always pulls his partner close to him, their head on his chest and his arms wrap around them tight and warm. His partner always complains he runs too hot, but he loves the feeling of a body against his. He loves sex, but he also being close to someone and someone playing with his hair. He’s sweaty and sated and sore and tired and cuddly. 

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)  
Steve has a huge daddy kink. He’s bi, and he loves women, has never been with a man of course, but he loves the idea. He thinks about it all the time, a big, burly man over him. Spreading his legs and fucking him hard and deep, letting Steve come all over them, while he pants out daddy in a high pitched voice. He’s gotten off to it more than once, and once had a dirty dream about Hopper, and woke up with sticky boxers, the words dying in his throat. 

 

J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)  
Steve gets off to two main fantasies. One is a woman on top of him, riding his dick like a dildo and only getting herself off. He loves the thought of someone using him, no matter their gender. But he especially loves the idea of a woman riding him until they both come, and then her sitting on his face while he eats the come out of her.   
The next fantasy is his daddy inside of him, fucking Steve within an inch of his life with a thick hand wrapped around his cock while Steve begs his daddy to come. Sometimes his daddy lets him, when he’s practically crying, his daddy will let him come, if he can come untouched. Other times his daddy holds his cock and he’s not allowed to come, just has to wait for his erection to go down until he can go to sleep. 

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)  
Steve is a tits guy. He loves breasts. And girls love wearing push up bras and teasing him, and he has to force himself to look them in the eyes. He just thinks about sucking on their pretty pink nipples and laying his head on their pillowy softness. He loves teasing. Flirting is his favorite, but especially when girls act like they don’t like him or they’re out of his league. It’s hard to find girls who do this, because he’s ya know Steve Harrington, but when he does it turns him on to no end, the witty banter of the two of them. He’s also extremely turned on by man’s hands, especially big beefy ones with thick fingers he wants inside of him, or wrapped around his hips leaving bruises on his hips. 

T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)  
Steve totally has a fleshlight. He’d been so embarrassed to buy it, but it wasn’t enough anymore, getting off with his calloused hand and lotion. So he’d driven to the next town over to get some good lube and the fleshlight was just there, looking… good as fuck. He fucks it all the time. Braces himself against the headboard and pistons his hips into the plastic that has no right to feel so fucking good. He scoops his come out and sucks on his fingers and imagines it’s someone else's. 

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)  
Steve is loud. He grunts and whines and moans his partners name. He dirty talks, let’s all these fantasies and kinky words fall from his lips, and his partner is always embarrassed, just in case someone hears them and then Steve makes it his priority to make them scream.


	39. Kalancy/Stonathan/Stancy

Kalancy- “We’re in the middle of a thunderstorm and you wanna stop and feel the rain?”

I’m not gonna lie to y’all…. white people LOVE to play in the rain.

They step out of the door to the parking lot and are immediately greeted by rain and gray skies. It’s pouring, and neither of them are dressed for the weather, because this is summer, but it’s summer in Indiana.

“Well fuck,” Kali says annoyed, shoving her bags up her arm.

“It’s not that bad,” says Nancy, stepping out from under the ledge of the building. She’s almost immediately soaked, bangs plastering to her forehead, shirt dampening.

Kali rolls her eyes, “Fine, you go get the car.” She reaches into her shorts’ pocket and tosses them to Nancy, who’s still just standing in the rain.

Nancy catches the keys, “Okay, in a minute,” she says, looking up at the sky through narrowed eyes.

Kali stares, open mouthed, “We’re in the middle of a thunderstorm and you wanna stop and feel the rain?!”

Nancy looks over at her and grins, even though her face is turning red with the cold,  
“Um, yeah. It’s cleansing.”

Kali laughs, “Oh, so you need to be baptized now?”

Nancy flips her off, “Fine, fine, you just see if I come back to get you.”

Kali shrugs, “I’m not worried about that, I have your Victoria’s Secret bag.”

Nancy glares, “Well shit.”

Stonathan: “Hey! I was gonna eat that!”

This is dedicated to @veganmikehanlon because I just told them the other day I want this to be the biggest problem in my life.

It’s been a hard day. Not even a hard day, just a day that is so mundane and boring it makes him question his entire life, which makes him want to eat the entirety of a pack of Nutter Butters. He’ll have to settle for the quarter of a pack that’s left (because Steve has no self control.)

He barely sets down his work bag before he’s opening the cupboard, content to shove cookies into his mouth like an animal over the sink, and grabs the package, quickly tearing open the top… only to find an empty container.

“What the fuck?!”

Steve has a tendency of not fucking throwing packages away but this is cruel.  
“Steve!” He shouts.

Steve leisurely walks into the kitchen, he’s wearing pajama pants and a T-shirt and he clearly just woke up from dozing.

“I was gonna eat these!” Jonathan says loudly, waving the empty package.

Steve winces slightly,  
“I’m sorry.”

“Sorry?! Does sorry bring back my Nutter Butters?! And for the love of god, stop leaving empty containers in the cupboard and giving me hope!” Jonathan’s flustered and can actually feel his armpits dampening, “Fuck!” He says again, though with a bit less heat.

Steve’s just staring at him, brown eyes wide. Jonathan realizes he’s wearing his shirt, and Steve busts out laughing after a few moments of silence.

“What?” Jonathan demands.

Steve laughs again, and Jonathan crunches the package loudly, throwing it in the trash with a loud thud,

“What are you laughing at?”

He’s totally justified. Steve probably thinks it’s funny, but he’s already had a healthy share of Nutter Butters. If the roles were reversed, Jonathan would be happy too.

“Just, this is our biggest problem right now?” Steve asks between giggles, “Geez, you marry a guy, get a mortgage and suddenly you’re fighting about cookies, that aren’t even that good anyway, at, what, five at night?”

Jonathan stares at him, and then busts out laughing himself, and then walks around the counter to hug Steve and give him a kiss,

“I guess you get spoiled when all your bills are paid on time.”

Steve laughs and pecks him again,  
“Apparently.”

“You still owe me a pack of cookies.”

“Of course,” Steve smiles.

Stancy: “Don’t you dare throw that snowba-, goddammit!”

Nancy internally groans when they step outside. The snow is up to her mid calf and she immediately realizes she worse the wrong snow boots. They only have to make it from here to an Uber and then into the hotel and then she’ll be fine, but that’s not the point.

She’s tired and slightly crabby, flying always makes her feel like a quick onset of the flu is coming on and it takes her about ten of those damn exercises to finally get her ears to unpop.

However it wasn’t a bad flight, and their luggage was quick, and Steve was a gentleman rolling their checked bags while she carried their carry ons. But there had been a delay and a coffee and Bailey’s is calling her name before Steve drags her out on the slopes.

“You wanna request it?” Steve asks, parking the suitcases.

Snow flutters down in soft little flakes and Nancy pulls out her phone to request an Uber. She turns to tell Steve they’ve got about twenty minutes, when she sees a wad of snow in his hand.

She immediately backs up,  
“Don’t you dare throw that snowball- goddammit!” She shouts. Steve had thrown it right at her neck because he had told her to wear a scarf and she shivers as it slides down her coat and shirt.

She stomps over to him and shoved him hard,  
“Oh I fucking-“

Steve slips and his reflexes aren’t fast enough to stop himself from falling into the snow bank but they are enough to pull Nancy with him. She screams, even though he lands in the snow and she’s on top of him, but he immediately rolls over, forcing her to get wet as well.

“Fucking love me?” He asks, nose pink, pressing his icy lips to hers.

She shoves at him,  
“You’re an asshole.”

“The asshole you married,” he grins.


	40. Constellations LuMax

The thing is, Max doesn’t really care, but Lucas does. It’s kind of like her with skateboard. Lucas encourages it and gets excited watching her, but it’s just not his thing.  
That’s like Max with constellations. She doesn’t know if she’s just convinced herself it’s girly to like stars or she knows no idea what the actual hell they are.

But Lucas is obsessed, so she sits out on a blanket with him, on the low slope of her room and watches him. He’s handsome. She knows. The slope of his nose and his smooth dark skin and his bright wide smile. His eyes were always so big and so excited and trained on her.

The moon hasn’t fully risen yet, they can’t fully see all the stars, but Lucas is going on about what they’ll be able to see at this time. It’s chilly, and she’s got her knees pressed to her chest, and Lucas is doodling on her arm with a sharpie while the sky gets dark around them.

Lucas finally pockets the sharpie when the constellations start appearing and Max leans into him and he wraps an arm around her and she feels the way his shoulders move when he inhales as he rumbles along, point out constellation after constellation.

They’re beautiful to Max of course. But all she sees is the glittering, twinkling lights of nebulas against an inky blackened indigo sky, reminding her that there was so much out there than her. Than Lucas. Than them. Though it didn’t feel like it.

Max must doze off at some point because the next thing she knows, Lucas is shaking her awake and helping her up. She wishes they were older and Lucas could carry her because she really doesn’t wanna walk. But for now they’re practically the same height.

They slide off the roof and Lucas helps her climb back into her bedroom. He stands on his tiptoes to give her a kiss. She kisses him back and pulls back, tucking a piece of hair behind her ear, cheeks flaming like they do every time.

“Goodnight stalker.”

“Goodnight Mad Max,” he says with a grin.

She watches him hop on his bike and start towards his house before shutting her window and pulling the blinds. It’s not until she flops on her bed that she sees her arm. The one constellation she can recognize on her own. Cassiopeia dotted along her inner forearm.

She’d loved the story and said she hoped one day she’d be so pretty that she could be the most vain woman in the world and Lucas said she was on her way there and she’d blushed and shoved him so hard he almost slid off the roof.

She smiles at the memory and traces the shiny sharpie on her pale arm. Walks over to the window and sees if she can recognize any constellations.


End file.
